Page 54 of False Start

I grin. “How is Rowan?”

“Totally in loooooove,” he sings. “With me,” he says as if I didn’t pick up on that.

“Never change, Benny,” I say, slapping him on the shoulder.

“Look.” He gets semi-serious on me. “Sometimes you just have to wait these grumpy men out. Show them how good it can feel to be in love around everyone else. To not care so much about ignorant assholes, but mostly, you just have to show them you aren’t going there.”

I think that over. Surely he knows that, but maybe he doesn’t. We did get together pretty soon after Vanessa broke up with me. Maybe he thinks this thing isn’t permanent.

That thought breaks my damn heart because it’s forever for me.

I grab my order, and Benny grabs his before we walk out toward our cars. “Thanks, Benny.”

“Good luck, Vaughn.”

He salutes me, and I wave, heading to my car and ready to drive straight to my man.

I have to show him this is it for me and hope like hell he knows, without a doubt, I’m not going anywhere.

25

AUSTIN

“You okay, sweetie?” my mom asks as I look toward the front door at Vaughn’s parent’s house for the fiftieth time. I need to chill out, but it’s like a limb is missing. Which is so not a good thing when I’m keeping something from my parents like this.

“Yeah. I’m fine,” I say, but I can sense her worry, and I know I should cool it.

“How is school?”

I smile at her now because school is great, even though I’m starting to think maybe I chose the wrong one. I was so afraid that going to State would hold me back, but now it kind of feels like choosing KU is holding me back from being with Vaughn. Which is crazy and confusing.

I know it’s probably not going to last—I mean our own parents don’t even know, for Christ’s sake—but I could have been with him every day. If it’s going to end anyway, shouldn’t I try to get every second I can?

The thought of it ending at all makes my gut sink though. I never thought this would be possible. I thought going to KU could be a distraction from the pain—that maybe I’d meetsomeone I liked even half as much as Vaughn—but I think I was lying to myself.

“It’s good,” I answer vaguely.

But she doesn’t get to ask another question because the front door opens, and in comes Vaughn, a great big smile and three pies in his hands. His dad rushes over to take two, and he puts one on the counter. His eyes find me, and even before he does it, I know what’s going to happen. I could stop it—maybe—but I freeze as he walks over, takes my face in his hands and kisses the hell out of me.

I get lost in it for a moment, the rest of the room disappearing. My grandparents are here, so are his, along with his sister, his parents and mine, but they’re in the back of my mind right now as Vaughn feasts on my lips.

I grab his biceps and hold onto him instead of pushing him away, and it’s only when I hear a throat clearing that I jolt back. Vaughn looks just as stunned as I do, and when I look around at all the faces watching us, it’s clear we aren’t the only ones.

“You have something to tell us?” my mom asks, her arms folded, but she doesn’t look mad. Or eventhatshocked.

I look over at my mom, my mouth gaping open and then closing, then turn to Vaughn. “Oh shit,” he says. “I, um...” He looks panicked now—and this is what I mean by him not being afraid of anything. He just acts without thinking, and he looks like he’s going to puke now. “Shit, Austin. I’m so sorry. I didn’t mean to out you. I swear... I didn’t plan to do that.”

Oh. Ohhhhh... He’s worried about me. Not him.

My mother, God bless her, actually chuckles at that. “Honey, I think Austin was already out.”

I turn to her now. “What?”

She raises one stern eyebrow at me. “Really? You’re going to play it that way? I hear you had a pretty big coming out.”

Okay, what the hell? She knew about that? “You didn’t say anything?”

She waves me off and shares a smile with my father—who’s looking pretty smug. “Honey, a mother knows her son. I had an idea about it before the gossip in town started. Do you really think it matters to us?”

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