Page 50 of Silent Lucidity

Though the room had a faint, musty smell, it was surprisingly well-kept for a place in the Bowels. The furniture was simple but clean—a wide bed, a table with four chairs, a footlocker, and a desk with a lone console to access the plexus, Arthos’s integrated collection of computer networks. Two doors led out of the bedroom, one into a small kitchen and the other into a bathroom.

He’d not thought to come to one of these places—discreet safehouses scattered throughout the Bowels which could only be rented through hidden, automated terminals—because he’d never had to use one. This was the sort of place where he’d found a few of his marks over the years, the sort of place to which prey fled. A desperate shelter for targets of the Order.

And now I am a target of the Order.

He knew these safehouses were entirely off the record from experience; the terminals accepted only credits that weren’t linked to accounts and kept no documentation regarding their patrons. Finding people holed up in such places was not impossible, but it was difficult, and Tenthil had already set a pattern the Order might not have expected him to break—he’d been staying in locations previously used by targets he’d eliminated.

Tenthil could only hope he and Abella would have some time to breathe here.

He turned and slid the heavy-duty deadbolts into place—one slid into the top of the doorframe, the other into the floor—tossed his backpack and cloak on the floor, and walked to Abella. Taking hold of her shoulders, he spun her to face him. For a few moments, she stared up at him, her glistening eyes, red from her tears, wary. Tenthil wasn’t sure of everything he felt in that moment—too many feelings, perhaps, to ever sort out—but a sense of relief was foremost.

He took her in his arms and drew her against his chest, lowering his cheek to her hair. He smoothed one hand up and down her back, willing away the tension threatening to curl his fingers and extend his claws.

Her shoulders shook as she cried against his chest, her sobs no longer repressed but full and raw. It was as though she’d held on to these tears for years, as though she’d been unwilling to release her pain and loss. Her fingers clutched as his waist, pressing into the flesh above his hip bones.

“Why didn’t you just take me to the humans?” she asked between cries.

The pain and despair in her voice sank into Tenthil’s gut like the twisting blade of a knife.

“Theycannotprotect you from the Order,” he said. “Only I can.”

“You don’t know that!”

He rubbed his cheek against her hair, inhaling her scent, which had changed subtly since they’d come together in the bathroom earlier. He swore he picked up a hint of himself in her smell; he shrugged it off as a matter of him holding her while they traveled over the last several hours.

Gently, he ran his claws through her hair. “You are mine, Abella.”

She shook her head and pulled back, lifting her face to look up at him. “No, I’m not. The choice ismine, Tenthil. Mine. You can’t just…own me.”

“Neither of us has a choice in this.”

“What do you mean? We always have a choice.”

“I don’t. Not when it comes to you.”

Her brows lowered. “I don’t understand.”

He looked down, searching out the right words. He’d spent most of his life listening to and prying secrets from others, yet still found it difficult to reveal his own, even to her.

“Something in me recognizes you.” He met her gaze again. “Something in me knows that you are mine. That I am yours. I cannot ignore it, cannot deny it. It is the deepest, most primal part of me.”

“Are you…are you talking about soul mates?”

Soul mates. He’d never heard the term before, but it soundedright.

“Yes.”

Her eyes searched his. “You think I’m your soul mate?”

“Iknow.”

Abella looked away, giving him a fleeting glimpse of the flush that had risen on her cheeks. “That kind of thing isn’t real. People want to believe in it, want to believe there’s a true love out there for them, but…it’s just not real. You don’t know me, Tenthil. What you feel is lust.”

“You think lust alone could have driven me to do what I have done?” Every word was like a hot coal rising from his throat, but he couldn’t stop, couldn’t bear more silence. He caught her chin between his fingers and forced her to look at him. “I have made war on everything I knew to have you. I have riskedeverythingto have you and will continue to do so until the Void swallows me for eternity.”

Fresh tears gathered in her eyes, shimmering as they caught the overhead light, and spilled down her cheeks. Her fingers tightened on his waist until, finally, she slid her arms around him and rested her head upon his chest.

Something warmed inside Tenthil. He wrapped his arms around her and held her close, once more settling his cheek atop her hair to draw in her scent.

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