Page 109 of Slap Shot Daddies

I want to tell her I’m sorry for my hesitation, that I’m ready to embrace the unknown, that I love her. But instead, I slip the phone back into my pocket, the decision weighing heavily on me.

I need to demonstrate my feelings with actions, not just words. Words can be hollow echoes, but actions have a way of speaking truths. I'm determined to step off the sidelines and actively participate in my own life.

I turn back toward home, my steps slower and more deliberate, as if I'm trying to stretch out the moment, the heaviness in my chest a bit lighter than before.

I still don’t know if I feel the same way they do about this whole situation. Love. That word has always been complicated for me.

I love my son without any doubts, love his laughter and the way he looks up at me with those trusting eyes. But loving an adult, a partner, that's a different beast altogether.

It's something scarier, like standing at the edge of a cliff, not sure if I'll fall or fly.

As I cross into our neighborhood, the scent of distant chimney smoke swirls with the crisp air, filling my lungs with a sense of nostalgia.

My sneakers thud against the pavement with a steady rhythm that is oddly soothing, the sound echoing in the quiet morning.

Then, my phone buzzes in my pocket, breaking the serene silence. I slow to a stop, pulling it out with fingers that are stiff and chilled from the cold.

Swiping open the group chat, I read the message from Kenzie.

>> We all love you, Ambrose. You don’t have to feel just like us, but we want you to be a part of this, to be a part of our baby’s life. Take your time. Xo.

I stare at the screen, my heartbeat quickening in a new rhythm, not from running or exertion, but from a place deep inside me.

She means it.

Even after everything, after how I've kept my walls up, she still wants me in this.

I don’t deserve her kindness and patience. But damn, I want to try.

A small, reluctant smile tugs at my lips, and I shake my head, a mix of exasperation and affection bubbling within me.

She’s impossible. Stubborn as hell, her emotions swinging like a wild pendulum, unpredictable in every sense, and yet, there's a strange comfort in her chaos, a way she has of making everything feel a little less daunting.

The weight of needing to have it all figured out lifts slightly, like a fog clearing from the path ahead.

Maybe I don't have to have all the answers right now.

Maybe I just need to be present.

I hold down the voice text button, my thumb pressing into the cool, smooth glass of my phone screen, and speak, my voice rough, still catching my breath from my morning run. "I’m sorry for running off. I’ll be home soon."

A quiet sense of relief washes over me, settling the restless thoughts that had been swirling. I jog the last few blocks back home, the rhythmic thud of my sneakers against the pavement echoing my growing resolve.

My feet move faster now, like my body is racing to catch up to the acceptance dawning in my heart.

I don’t have to be perfect.

I just have to show up.

CHAPTER TWENTY-EIGHT

Kenzie

The SUV feels cramped,despite its massive frame.

The rich aroma of the leather seats is interwoven with the sharp, woodsy notes of Ambrose’s aftershave, creating a heady mix alongside Reggie’s spicy cologne and the crisp, sweet scent of Braden’s spearmint gum.

Pregnancy has really made my olfactory nerves go into overdrive.

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