Page 93 of Study Buddies

“That’s his influence, Tori,” he growled. “Can’t you see that? You’d never do something so messed up on your own.”

“What about Jayden?” I asked, blinking more tears away. “Is he just another pawn in Kyle’s evil game?”

“No, but he can—” Lucas started.

“He can make his own decisions,” I finished for him. “Right? That’s what you were going to say. But I can’t. Is that becauseI’m a woman, or because I’m easily led astray, or maybe just not smart enough to know my own mind?”

“Tori, I?—”

“You’re not giving me any credit,” I cut in. “I’m making my own choices, and you’re too hung up on what Kyle did in high school to see that. At the library, there were three willing participants, not a puppet master and a victim and whatever the hell you’re telling yourself Jayden was. If you need to blame someone, blame me, too. It’s not right to only blame Kyle. I’m not an innocent child with no control over my own fate, Lucas. I’m not, and I bet Natalie wasn’t either.”

Time stopped, and I gasped at what I’d said. I’d gone too far. I should’ve just talked about this current situation, not the past. Even if it sure seemed to me like there were some parallels. “Lucas, I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have?—”

Before I could finish, he opened the car door and left without a word—again.

And I felt absolutely awful—again.

“Sleep well?”Jayden asked when I staggered into the kitchen Friday morning. He had a cup of coffee in his hand, and I contemplated swiping it from him. It seemed too exhausting to get my own.

“I think I can answer my own question,” he said, studying me. “Your eyes are red, your sweatshirt is on inside out, and at least a third of your hair is stuck outside of the ponytail elastic.”

I scowled, but yanked the elastic out of my hair, wincing at the tug. I bent forward, letting my hair fall toward the floor, gathered it up in one hand, and put the elastic back on. When I straightened, I was dizzy for a moment.

“You okay?” Jayden asked.

“No. But why are you?” I grumbled. He was acting like it was a normal morning. “Lucas is your best friend. Shouldn’t you be upset that he’s upset?”

“I am.”

“You don’t seem like it.”

Jayden took out a mug and got me some coffee, probably hoping it would improve my mood.

“I’m sorry he’s hurt, but I don’t regret what we did last night at the study group. Do you?”

“No.”

“Good.” He handed over the coffee, and I took it gratefully.

After a long gulp, I tried to force my brain to function. “Where are the others?”

“Lucas is taking a shower downstairs, and I convinced Kyle it would be a good morning for him to head to campus early and hit the gym.”

“And he didn’t argue with that?”

“No. He knows the score.”

That was more proof for my argument last night—that Kyle wasn’t the devil incarnate. But I’d done a lousy job of convincing Lucas of that.

I took the mug to the table and sat down. “What are we going to do?”

“I don’t know,” he said with a sigh as he sat opposite me. “This is kind of fucked up.”

“Yeah. But I didn’t know what to do about it.”

“Do you want something to eat? I could make bacon or toast.” Apparently, his main strategy was to distract us from the problem through nourishment.

“Thanks, but I don’t think my stomach could take it right now.”

---