Page 16 of Maddox

I hesitated, then added, "I'm not sure about pet names or...or calling you Daddy. At least not yet."

"That's fine," Maddox assured me, and I felt a flash of annoyance. What was I, five?

But that anger accompanied a startling thought. I’d never explored my Little side, never allowed myself to experiment with ages. And before I could second guess myself, I spoke, "I...I'm not sure about ages," I admitted quietly. "I've never really explored that aspect before."

Maddox nodded encouragingly. "That's okay. We can figure that out together, if you want. There's no rush to define everything right away, plus your Little side might change as you become more comfortable."

I felt a small wave of relief at his words. "Okay," I said softly. "So what...what would this look like? Practically speaking?"

"Well," Maddox said thoughtfully, "we could start small. Maybe set aside some time each week where you can explore your Little side in a safe environment. We could do simpleactivities—coloring, watching cartoons, reading stories. Nothing too intense."

The idea both thrilled and terrified me. "And you would...take care of me during that time?"

Maddox's expression softened. "If that's what you want, yes. I could prepare snacks, help you with activities, comfort you if you get overwhelmed. But always respecting your boundaries."

I nodded slowly, trying to imagine it. Part of me longed for that kind of care and attention, while another part screamed that it was dangerous to be so vulnerable.

And a hidden part of me wanted more.

"We don't have to decide everything right now," Maddox added gently, seeming to sense my inner turmoil. "We can take it one step at a time."

I took a sip of my tea, using the moment to gather my thoughts. "Okay," I said softly. "I think... I think I'd like to try. Maybe we could start with just an hour or two? At your place, if that's alright."

Maddox nodded, a gentle smile on his face. "Of course. We can do it whenever you're comfortable. No rush."

"Maybe... this weekend?" I suggested, surprising myself with my eagerness.

"That sounds perfect," Maddox agreed.

As we finished our drinks and prepared to leave, Maddox reached across the table, his hand hovering near mine but not quite touching. "Clare," he said seriously, "I know I’ve said this but it bears repeating. I want you to know how proud I am of you for taking this step. It's incredibly brave."

Tears pricked at my eyes, and I blinked them back furiously. "Thank you," I whispered. "One step at a time sounds good.”

“Sure you want to come to my house?”

I nodded, a mix of excitement and anxiety swirling in my stomach. "What should I bring?"

"Just yourself," Maddox said warmly. "I'll have everything we might need. But if there's a special stuffie or blanket you'd like to bring, please do."

The thought of bringing Mr. Snuggles, my old teddy bear, flashed through my mind. I quickly pushed it away, feeling childish. "Okay," I said instead.

Then I registered what he’d said about me going to his home. The thought of going to his made my stomach clench with anxiety, but I pushed through it because I’d asked for it. I could have asked him to mine but I hadn’t. I needed to face my fears if I was ever going to move forward. "Okay," I agreed again, my voice barely above a whisper. "Saturday afternoon?"

"Saturday works perfectly," Maddox said. "And Clare, I want you to know—you're in control here. If at any point you feel uncomfortable or want to stop, just say the word and we'll end the session immediately. No questions asked. I’ll text you the address, but please tell someone you trust where you’ll be.”

His words helped ease some of the tension in my chest, even if I didn’t have asomeone I could trustlist. "Thank you," I said sincerely.

As we finalized the details, I felt a mix of anticipation and fear swirling inside me. Part of me couldn't wait to explore this side of myself again, to feel cared for and protected. But another part was terrified of letting my guard down, of being vulnerable again. Could I trust Maddox?

I guessed there was only one way to find out.

Chapter Seven

MADDOX

“Jeremy Blakeny seems to be in Hong Kong.” Eric, our computer expert, said over the speaker, and I rolled my eyes. We weren’t getting anywhere. The stalemate with the video of my face when we’d rescued Clare was stopping us from getting to him and finally taking him out. He’d said the copy was with his lawyer and would be released if anything happened to him.

I glanced over at everyone and saw my frustration mirrored on their faces. Gideon’s especially as he’d been with me, and as our team leader he usually took on the responsibility for the whole mission.