Page 130 of Deacon

Taken aback, I put my utensils down too. “You don’t touch yourself, sweetheart?”

Her cheeks are so pink now, they’re glowing. She shakes her head.

“So when I fucked you the first time…was that the first time you came?”

“No,” she says. “I didn’t say I’ve never done it, I just don’t do it much. Why? Do you?”

I shrug. “Yeah, a few times a week, maybe more. Less since you got here.”

“Why?” Her wary gaze has a hint of curiosity.

“It’s like an oil change. Out with the old, in with the new,” I say. “Nothing wrong with it.”

She squirms. It’s killing her to have this conversation at the breakfast table.

“Do you like the way it feels?” I ask.

“Of course I do,” she manages. “It’s just…I think all the years of being called a whore made me think that if I did anything sexual at all, it would prove that right.”

“I get called a whore,” I say. “It’s not a bad thing.”

She turns a sharp stare on me. “You’re a man. When people say that, it’s a joke. When they say it to me, it’s an insult.”

“What about when I say it to you?” I ask, leaning in.

She bites her lip, releasing it, leaving a white mark.

“It’s nice when you do it,” she says, voice raspy. “It feels good, safe.”

I study her. Inside, I’m imagining going into the blacksmith shop, picking up one of those fence spikes, and sticking it into the side of Aiden’s head.

He’s such an asshole.

And he’s so weird about Freya, so deliberate in the way he tortured her.

Killing him would feel so good.

“In the morning, I want you to take the time that I’m in the barn and get yourself off,” I say. “I’ll get you a vibrator for it. When you’re done, leave the vibrator on my pillow.”

Her eyes widen.

“You want me to put a used vibrator on your pillow?” she asks, horrified.

“Yeah, I do.”

“But why?”

“Because I like your cunt,” I say. “I like the way it tastes, the way it smells, the way it feels.

Her eyes are wide, lips parted.

“You’re…a lot,” she says.

“Am I too much?” I ask.

She shakes her head. A smile, faint and soft, appears. “No. I think I like it.”

I take her hand. She looks down and slowly curls her fingers through mine.

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