Page 44 of Undercover Desires

“Yes,” I grumble, still not able to wrap my head around that connection.

She shakes her head. “Wow, okay. Let’s deal with that can of worms later. Right now, I want to focus on the part that has you the most worked up. You were worried about the guy, the one from the club? Worried she would take him up on his offer.” Maeve’s eyes implore me to answer honestly.

“Why wouldn’t she? She needs the money.”

“Did she?” Maeve presses.

“She couldn’t. She has a contract with me,” I admit, watching to see her reaction.

I see the disappointment written all over her face. This is the opposite of what we have been talking about in these sessions. “I’m going to ask you this as a friend and not your therapist. What the hell did you do? For someone so intelligent, this sounds like an extremely dangerous idea. You mix sex into all of this, the kind of stuff you’re into. Come on, Kobe. What the hell.”

My hands fly up in defense. “I know it sounds bad.” I pause, trying to articulate how stupid I have been in words. Maeve knows this world, she gets it better than anyone. She used to work over at Axel’s club, After Dark, before she met his brother. I know I can confide in her. “I felt backed into a corner. He was after her, added her name to the auction list last minute so no one knew about it except me. She doesn’t even understand how this shit works. I had a contract drawn up immediately, and I convinced her to go with my early bid.”

“You can’t convince me you did this to protect her. I know how much you like control. You did this for yourself, Kobe.” She pushes her glasses back up her nose, eyeing me with annoyance. She’s supposed to remain impartial, but it seems I have really stepped over the line this time.

“Who was she better with, me or him?” I ask her more seriously. The idea of her going off with him makes me homicidal. It would have ended badly for all of us. Especially him. I don’t care how much money he brings into my club.

She taps her pen on the notepad, thinking. “Who’s the suit?”

“Jae Lucas,” I tell her so she gets why I had to do what I did. She knows him, I know she does.

I see the flash of understanding in her eyes. “Okay, what did she think of all of this? She’s new to this world, the poor girl is probably freaked out. Auctions, bids, contracts, for usit’s normal. For her looking in from the outside, it would be madness.”

I sigh, seeing what she's saying, but Arabella walked into my club thinking she was going to investigate me. She had to have done at least a little research on the place. I don’t feel as guilty as Maeve would have me think I should. “She signed the contract. She wasn’t happy about it, but I didn’t give her any other choice.” I shrug. “The money will help her out,” I add, trying to make myself sound better than I am. “And sex wasn’t part of our agreement.”

Maeve raises a brow like she’s not impressed with my excuses.

“She challenges me on everything. She pushes my fucking buttons, Maeve. And she pushed me to...” I hesitate, struggling to find the words. “I’m not proud of myself for giving into my urges last night, but she made me feel desperate. Out of control. On the edge of losing my mind completely, and I knew I couldn’t hold back a second longer.”

“What did you do, Kobe?” Maeve demands, her tone serious.

I consider how honest I should be. I know I’m walking a fine line already. Fuck, who cares. Whatever I tell Maeve can't leave this room anyway, and I can't talk to my brothers about this. Leo would fire Arabella immediately, and Jett would use it as excuse to rib me. They don’t get it, how she makes me feel. “I made it obvious to her and to him she was mine,” I say, leaving out the sordid details. I don’t think I could tell Maeve anything that would shock her, but something stops me from actually saying it out loud. Guilt, maybe.

“You let your jealousy take over, and you did something you regret?” Maeve questions.

“I don’t regret it for a second; it was exactly what I wanted to do. I just know I shouldn’t be messing around with her,” I confess. “It’s bad for business. I probably pissed off one of our best patrons. Went against Leo’s new rules. And I let her see aside of me I shouldn’t be showing the girl who is investigating my family.”

“So, you feel guilty because you’re worried about how this will affect your business and your brothers?” Maeve analyzes, jotting down notes in her little notebook.

My neck twitches. I hate that notebook. Guilt and jealousy—words I wouldn’t usually associate with myself. I’m typically unfazed by the little things, letting them roll off my back because I just don’t care. But Bella brings out a different side of me, one I don’t like or even really understand.

“She’s playing me, and I’m letting her. How am I supposed to get this stuff under control?” I demand. We pay Maeve a lot of money to help me. She’s one of the smartest chicks I know. Why is she just asking me questions? She should be able to solve this problem for me. Where is the magic pill I can take to make the crazy for her disappear so I can get on with my life? “I’m supposed to be focused on Jett. He needs to win this title, and that’s on my shoulders. How can I concentrate when my head is filled with all this crap?”

Maeve takes a moment to assess me, her gaze steady and thoughtful.

“It's normal to feel different emotions in any relationship, including attraction and frustration. However, it’s crucial to manage these emotions constructively.

“First, setting clear boundaries with Bella is essential to maintain a professional and ethical dynamic. This contract needs to go. You have locked yourself into an agreement with her that you yourself don’t know how to control. You know as well as anyone it doesn’t work like this. Both of you need to be willing participants for any sort of arrangement to work. If you have good intentions, it can lead to an amazing relationship. However, trying to control her with a contract suggests you feelout of control. And I think we both know it’s never going to work.”

I glare at her for trying to school me on a game I made the rules to. I can use a contract to do whatever the hell I want, but I hate the way she tells me it's because I need control.

“Discuss your concerns openly with her, emphasizing the importance of maintaining a work relationship. You already know what you need to do there. If you can’t stay away from her, she probably shouldn’t be working for you. Have you thought about why you kept her on, even though you know she’s a cop?”

“We kept her on because we want to know what she’s up to. If she’s working for me, I can keep an eye on her,” I growl out, sounding more like Leo than myself. Who is she turning me into?

“Maybe she needs to be one of your brothers’ responsibilities, give you a little distance,” she suggests.

The thought makes me feel uncomfortable. She’s my responsibility. I brought her into our lives, and now I need to be the one to take control of this situation. My fists clench, anger surging through me.

---