Page 20 of Undercover Desires

“I’m seeing that. When I first walked into this place Friday night, I wasn’t sure about it. Kobe was selling me the job, but I was so intimidated by the idea.”

“You’re already fitting in just fine,” she says, her tone warm, as if she’s genuinely happy to have me here.

I smile back at her, grateful to be making a new friend. It’s been a while since I have had a genuine conversation with another girl. When I broke up with Wyatt, my friends didn’t understand. We were all part of the same group, we went to high school together, and they sided with him.

I have felt so lonely these last few months, just trying to work my ass off so I could get out of LA and make a new life for myself. I didn’t even realize how sad I was about it until I saw the way these girls interacted with each other. They are all so close they have their own language. I know I’m not here to make friends, but while I’m stuck here, it couldn’t hurt. Creepy unease sinks under my skin, knowing they will all hate me when they realize who I really am. But I can’t focus on that right now. Xavier is opening up to me. I need to press her for some information that can help with my case. “So, the Rivera brothers are decent guys?” I ask, curiosity creeping into my voice.

“The best,” she replies without hesitation. “The guy over there in the suit with the stunning brunette is Leo. I don’t think you’ve had the chance to meet him yet.”

I glance over to where she’s pointing and see them. She’s right, the girl is strikingly beautiful. They sit together on one side of a booth, his arm wrapped around her. They couldn’t get any closer if they tried. She stares back at him, totally engrossed in what he’s saying. You can see the love they share. He doesn’t look like the cold-hearted killer I researched. He has a rough edge about him, but in that suit, he could be just a normal guy.

“He spends a lot of time in this place. Kobe normally hangs over at their bar, The Joker. It’s unusual for him to be here over two nights in a row, and Jett comes in and out; he’s focusing on his fighting career more than the clubs, so you won’t see him much. They will help you with anything you need, whether it's financial trouble or dealing with a difficult ex-boyfriend. They’re your guys.”

“You sound like you know this firsthand.”

“I do,” she says, her voice carrying a mix of gratitude and warmth. “Kobe especially, I owe him my life. I know he comes on way too strong, and you don’t know how to take him sometimes, but under all those abs and swagger, he’s the sweetest guy with a heart of gold.” Xavier smiles genuinely, as if she truly believes it. I can’t help but wonder what happened to her, what experiences led to such profound trust and loyalty toward these men.

Kobe comes from the offices and crosses the room right on cue, and I watch him stride confidently over to his brother’s table and take a seat. Xavier seems like a take-no-shit kind of girl, and if she says something is true, then I feel like at least in this setting it’s got to be accurate. Maybe there is another side to him she hasn’t seen. To all of the Riveras. There has to be. Something that makes them fit the profile Detective Reader was describing. Everyone has a side that they hide from others. Andthese guys would hardly be openly showing off the shit they get up to in order to keep a powerful hold on this town. Most of it would happen behind closed doors. I need to get closer to Kobe so I can see the real him. The side he’s hiding from even good friends like Xavier.

CHAPTER 9

KOBE

I close my eyes,trying to relax into the soft leather couch underneath me, but I see her again behind my eyelids. She’s poisoning my brain with her infectious smile. My body stiffens, detesting the effect she has on me.

“Why don’t you start by telling me about your week?” Maeve's calm voice floats through the room.

Cautiously, I glance at my therapist, Maeve. I’m not up for this shit today. She’s smiling toward me sweetly, her posture impeccable, hands neatly placed in her lap. Her glasses rest on the bridge of her nose, and her perfectly tailored white dress tells me she means business.

I have always found her attractive, but something about her is less appealing to me today. This is the same shit that’s been happening to me for days. Hot chicks that would normally have me imagining dirty scenarios of one-night stands that end in me getting exactly whatI want just don’t do it for me anymore. The only person I can think about is Arabella. My fist clenches at the thought.

Maeve Stone is a psychologist, one of the best ones around. Leo has been sending me to her for the last six months. Before that, I saw a nice young lady, Patricia, for a couple of years. That was until her husband walked in on us fucking on her couch. That’s when I figured it was time to find someone new. The black eye her husband gave me told me he agreed. Maeve's husband is Hendrix Stone, another MMA trainer and a friend, so Leo was sure there would be no chance of me messing around with her. He underestimates me. But I didn’t tell him that, cause I thought it might be fun charming Maeve.

“Why don’t you tell me about your week, Maeve,” I throw her question back at her, my tone challenging.

“You know that’s not how this works, Kobe. Come on, what has you shutting up shop on me?” Maeve insists.

“Ah, you know, just another week of mind-numbing ‘normalcy.’ Absolutely nothing to write home about,” I reply, attempting to deflect.

She looks me over, her warm brown eyes searching for the cracks in my armor. I know she sees right through me; this is a game we play often. Most of the time, she wins, and I give in, telling her what’s bothering me. But today, I don’t know how to say it all out loud. I’m angry and frustrated, and it’s not like me.

Leo sends me to these sessions because he thinks I’m broken. Too fucked up in the head. When I was a teenager, he worried I was too good at laughing things off. Thought I needed someone to talk to about my parents’ deaths and being made an orphan at such ayoung age. But I didn’t. I had him and Jett. I don’t even remember our parents. I laugh things off because, honestly, what’s the point in taking life too seriously? We’ll all be dead soon anyway. But this situation with Arabella has me on edge in a way I don’t understand.

“How about I tell you what I see has changed since I saw you last then?” Maeve suggests.

“Go for it,” I say, a bit more willing to engage.

“You haven’t cracked a joke once since you got here, and instead of sitting on the couch and trying to manipulate me with your charm, you’re lying with your feet up and eyes closed, like you’re trying to block out the world.”

“Very observant, Doc,” I acknowledge with a wry grin.

“Should we go day by day, or are you going to tell me what’s bothering you?” she asks, a little frustration creeping into her calm demeanor.

Pausing for a moment, considering her, I then reply, “Well, Doc, let me tell you what’s been eating at me. I was a good boy and took your advice, and you know where that got me?” I look her over. She waits for me to go on. “A motherfucking hard-on I can’t get rid of and a new employee who wants to fuck me over instead of fuck around with me.”

She tilts her head, taking me in. I would kill to know what’s going on in that brain of hers. I despise the way therapists make you come to your own conclusions. I growl, “If you’ve got something to say, don’t keep it locked away in that pretty little head of yours, give it to me straight.”

“Okay. What I was thinking is that sounds like progress, like what we talked about. Not screwingeverything that moves just for the sake of it. How are you feeling now?”