Page 15 of Undercover Desires

I let out a deep breath, trying to remain composed. “What can I help you with, then? There’s nothing more for us to say.”

“Yes, there is,” he insists, his voice more forceful.

“Move on, Wyatt,” I cry out in frustration, my patience gone. It’s clear that this conversation isn’t going anywhere productive, and I need to focus on building a new life for myself.

“I can’t. I need you.” Wyatt’s voice breaks. I hear the tears in his words, and although my heart aches, I can’t let him draw me back into this manipulative cycle.

“You don’t need me,” I assert firmly, trying to stay strong. It’s true; he has a job now, and he needs to learn to stand on his own.What he doesn’t know is that I’m aware of his new relationship with another girl, thanks to social media. They’ve been together for months, and it’s time for him to move forward without me. What would she think of him still calling his ex every day?

“If you don’t come back, I’m going to kill myself,” he snaps angrily.

My heart sinks. Deep down inside, I know it’s bullshit, empty threats, and manipulation. I’ve been down this road before, and I won’t let myself be dragged back into that toxic cycle. With a heavy heart, I disconnect the call, knowing it’s the right decision for my own well-being.

When I left for six months to undergo my academy training, I had hoped I would return to a more self-sufficient boyfriend. Instead, he had become even more dependent on me. During my first two years on the force, I handled all the household tasks while he played games and didn’t look for a job. It all came down to his past trauma, his mother leaving him when he was young and him needing me to be the one to take her place. At least that’s what it felt like. He never actually said it. I still don’t think he realizes even now the pressure he placed on my shoulders.

I eventually reached my breaking point and couldn’t stand it any longer. I made the tough decision to move out, leaving behind everything I had worked so hard for in my career and my life. I couldn’t bring myself to return to that toxic environment for some items of clothing and furniture, it wasn’t worth it.

I’d made one attempt to leave before, but he refused to let me go, clinging desperately to me. I had to resort to slipping out while he was asleep to escape. That’s when I realized I needed to put distance between us for good. It was at that moment that the job opportunity in Palm Springs came up, and I saw it as my chance to start anew and create a life free from the suffocating grip of my past.

I stare down at my phone, hands trembling. It immediately rings again. I refuse to answer, hanging up once more. This time, I take a definitive step. I switch my phone off so he can’t call again, and later today I’ll get a new number, a fresh start. I can’t allow myself to be tortured by him any longer.

I place my nearly full bowl in the sink and quickly finish my tea. My plan is to make a start on the renovations before my shift at the club this afternoon. After a quick shower, I’ll start packing up some things from the spare room I’m staying in. I’ll bring them to a charity store later this week. I figure this is the easiest room to start with since most of Nanna’s prized possessions are in her bedroom and the living room. Everything in here is matchy-matchy; white lace curtains adorn the window, lace doilies in the same fabric cover the lampshade and sit on the dressing table. The bedspread before I changed it last week was a part of the same set. I’m not really sure what style I want this place to have yet, but I know it’s not this. I like more minimalist clean-cut designs in pale colors. I’m hoping to remove the floral wallpaper and paint the inside of the house in a pale gray or sage green, something neutral, more me.

As I work, my thoughts drift back to the tour with Kobe last night and that peculiar room he showed me—I’m calling it the sex room. I wonder if there are more rooms like that or if they’re all different. When I glanced down the hall, I could see at least four of them. I wish I could understand what came over me when I was in that room with him. I felt like an entirely different person, as if I wanted to shed all my inhibitions and just have a little fun. Do real people really go to places like that to escape their mundane lives? I can’t help but wonder what it would be like. Right now, I would give just about anything to escape the way I feel. The constant unease in my belly.

I walked away from my relationship, but I still feel so trapped by it. By my past. When do I get to move on and be the girl Iwant to be? I think half my problem is I don’t even really know who that is. I have spent so much of my life taking care of other people. First my dad. He was an amazing man, but when we left Australia and my mom, he was heartbroken, and it took him a long time to be okay without her. I was just a kid really, only fourteen, and I had a whole unfamiliar country to navigate, but I still supported him, made sure he was as happy as he could be. Then after he died, I had Wyatt who needed me to save him from himself. He was the polar opposite of my father but still as dependent on me. I didn’t know about his addiction problem until I was too invested in him to back out. I stayed for a lot longer than I should because I thought I could save him.

Now I’m here on my own. I’m not sure who I am, but I know something came over me in that room, standing there with Kobe. I wanted him to show me his world. I know it doesn’t make any sense, I know what kind of guy he is. But I felt like he could pull me out of this lost feeling I have been living with.

Maybe it’s the thought that a man could want me so much he would offer an exorbitant amount to spend the night with me. That would be freeing, somehow empowering. I wonder who the girls are that might go back there. Would Shelby or Xavier entertain such extravagant offers? It’s hard to picture, but maybe if someone offered the girls enough money, they might be tempted. I was too preoccupied with serving drinks last night to notice if anyone went in that direction, but the other girls mentioned that tonight should be less chaotic, so I’ll pay more attention this time.

I keep seeing Kobe’s face when he dropped me off at home. He wanted something from me, but I’m not entirely sure what it was. I know the girls said he is a manwhore, and it would be sex, but he was looking at me like he was trying to work me out. Like he wanted to get inside my brain, not so much my panties. He’s smarter than they all make him out, and in a lot of ways,that’s a hell of a lot more frightening. I know how vulnerable I am putting myself in this position. If he worked out I was an undercover cop, he could kill me. Do I think he would? I’m not sure yet. But what I know is I need to be more careful around him.

The morning disappears with me cleaning up the house and then moving outside to mow the unkept lawns with the ancient lawnmower I found in the shed. Carefully maneuvering around Nanna’s old sedan, I tried to start it, but it’s no use. The thing’s dead.

The number of jobs to do around the place is overwhelming on top of my now two jobs, but I want to bring her place back to life. It deserves to be the pride of the street like it once was.

As I work, the café across the street catches my eye. Caffeine Corner it’s called. It looks so cute, another original part of town. I’m not sure why I keep glancing over toward it, but something keeps catching my attention. Probably my rumbling tummy. I’m kind of hungry, but I’m holding off on buying groceries until I receive my pay tomorrow. I can eat when I get to work tonight, if I make it that long.

Wheeling the mower back inside the shed, I lock it up. The reflection in the side mirror of Nanna’s car catches my attention, and I glance behind me, my heart racing. But there is no one there. I could have sworn I saw a guy in a dark-colored hoody watching me. I hurry inside, freaked out, locking the door and leaning against it to catch my breath. This job is messing with my head already. I’m so jumpy today.

I close my eyes and see it again. There was definitely a man watching me. The picture in my mind isn’t clear enough to make out any features. I shake it off. I’m just being extra sensitive. Between the phone call from Wyatt this morning and my first shift last night, I’m all over the place today. It was probably justsome guy going for a walk. That would have explained why he was gone when I looked back. I’m sure that’s all it was.

CHAPTER 7

KOBE

I answer the phonequickly, disappearing into my office at The Joker and closing the door. I have been waiting for his call all morning and came down here to distract myself with work. “What can you tell me?”

“Checked public records and ran a background check on her,” Caleb replies, his voice sounding grim. “You’re not going to like what I found.”

“Tell me anyway,” I demand, my heart pounding in my chest. Who is she?

Caleb sighs heavily before continuing. “I had been trying to piece it all together, who this mystery girl was.” He pauses. “You were right; the license number you gave me is a fake, but it’s a damn good one, the kind I would have access to.”

I clench my fists, already knowing what he’s about to say. “And the address? What about that?”

“The address you provided was owned by a lady in her eighties before she passed away two years ago. It was left to her granddaughter, Arabella Hamilton.”