Page 134 of Gunner

“Do you feel differently now?”

“No. I think that’s why I’m struggling. The stories the nurse told me made them sound like every other man in my life who’d offered me something only to snatch it away and make me a prisoner. But those stories don’t match the man who carried me out of that cell. They don’t match the man who showed up at the clubhouse to protect his best friend’s children. And they don’t match the man who helped me become the person I am today.”

“Is it possible the nurse projected her own trauma onto you?”

“Don’t they teach them how not to do that?”

“They do, but sometimes our trauma is embedded so deep that if we don’t get help, it can overtake us, and we strike out in fear. I would be willing to bet whatever trauma she carried caused her to reach out to save you. While her actions may have been in haste, her ultimate motivation was to protect you. Remember, we are all human. And humans make mistakes.”

“That makes sense.”

“Can I ask what made you decide to become a part of the Silver Shadows here?”

Amber smiled as she looked out the window again. Following her gaze, I spotted Gunner leaning against his bike, smoking a cigarette and scrolling through his phone. I needed to talk to him about his smoking. While he looked sexy doing it, it wasn’t healthy.

The prospect that had brought Amber here at my behest, sat against his bike as well, only he was alert. He continued to look around to ensure our safety.

“I had been moving around, looking for a place to call home. I needed something that was mine. Something that I chose for myself. For my whole life, other people had made decisions for me. Even Valhalla. While what she does is incredible, she’s bossy.”

“Bossy how?”

“When Danny contacted me, he gave me a list of instructions and said they were from Valhalla. Things like what hair color and eye color I should have. How I should dress. What hobbies I could develop and which ones to stay away from. I never had a mom, but I imagine Valhalla would have been a strict one. She had Danny set me up in Chicago.”

“Did you like Chicago?”

“I did. I could hide. There were so many people there and no one noticed me. I felt invisible.”

“Until?”

“Until I saw him.”

Amber’s eyes glazed over again, and I knew she was back in her memories. She stared into nothing as she told me about the day she decided to take her life back for the second time.

“I had a job. I worked in a little coffee shop in the heart of downtown. I didn’t need to work. Danny had set me up with a bank account. Told me it was money that had been raised to help survivors. Something else from Valhalla and the women she worked with. But I wanted to do something, and the coffee shop was fun. I could talk to people without fear. It was probably the thing that healed me. It gave me the courage to be a part of life again.”

“Until?”

“Until he walked in. I had been in Chicago working in that little shop for months. I met people from all walks of life. Teenagers with crazy hairstyles; housewives in designer track outfits. Construction workers who flirted.” She snorted. “That took some getting used to. I had never had anyone flirt with me before. My co-workers had to explain it to me.”

“Boys in school didn’t flirt with you?”

She lost her smile, and I wanted to kick myself. “No.”

“Tell me about the others that came into the shop? Chicago is a pretty wealthy area.”

“It is. Lots of men in suits. And they knew how to wear them. You know Chicago is home to the Mafia, right?”

“The Mafia? Like the Mob? I thought those were gone in the late 90s?”

“Nope. Chicago has the Italian Mafia. The Valentinetti family. Five boys and one girl. She was always in the news. She was so beautiful. I imagine she had trouble getting dates though.”

“Why?”

“Because those five boys? They were all older than her. I imagine it would be hard for a girl with five older brothers who wouldn’t let anyone near their baby sister.”

Amber was stalling. It was a common tactic when someone didn’t want to talk about a particular event.

“Did you meet any of them?”