Page 121 of The Truths that Deceive

But even knowing all of that doesn’t stop me from the carnal thoughts about her that always seem to fog up my brain. Maybe it’s the drugs. Maybe it’s something more.

What I’d really like is to have her ride me. And I’m not going to lie. There’s a part that wants her in a hot little nurse outfit while she takes care of my whims on the road to recovery.

I’d start that with her deep throating me, sucking my balls. Maybe keep her snuggled next to me, her scent in my nose, soothing me, her heat warming me. Fuck, and we could argue and flirt, and I could take the time to learn more about her, the things that a dossier can never hold.

The things I haven’t discovered yet that make her tick. What her favorite food is, her favorite song. Her favorite band. She seems like anEinstürzende Neubautengirl to me, rocking out to complex industrial German music. Yeah,Collapsing New Buildingsis even her when I translate it. A facet of her. Of us. She?—

My eyes snap open.

What the actual fuck?

Inside my chest, my heart starts to throb and ache, and a vise tightens on my head.

How did a sex fantasy turn into mush?

No.

No fucking way.

She’s too young.

She’s not my type—okay, in essence she’s exactly my type, but she’s too fucking young. And I’m sending her as far away as I can.

“You can go home tomorrow.”

“I’m not a fucking baby,” I yell at Jones. “The shot went right through.”

“And it hit an artery. You lost a shit ton of blood. And fuck if I’m going to go and find another person to replace you in the Knighthood. It’s too much work.”

“For fuck’s sake.”

Jones sits on the chair opposite me. “She’s out there. Where are you sending her?”

“A long way from here.”

He rubs a hand over his eyes. “Do you think it’s that easy? I’ve been working on the stolen weapons shit for a few months. Not for the same reasons the CIA was. But there’s a guy I wanted and…” He shrugs. “Calista had an electronic trail turn up. A fluke, in the whole list of stuff you showed me. I saw that he went to a titty bar in Vietnam with a well-known Bolivian porn guy. Never would have found that link without her digging.”

“Let me guess. The guy’s run trafficked women to Rare Birds, Inc. and to the Collectors.” I pause. “And no, I don’t think it’ll be easy to send her away. She’ll miss her brother…”

I trail off because he’s staring at me.

“I meant breaking down the Collectors and all their subsidiaries,” he says with a lifted eyebrow. “We knew when we rescued Dakota that we wouldn’t get them all, and leaving some around to be watched helps us track more of them. But the more we uncover?—”

“The more of them pop up. I’m fucking aware.”

“Loose strands everywhere.” I laugh, but neither of usmistake it for humor. “We need a super database to keep track of all of this.”

Jones rises. “Interesting you say that.”

“Why?” I narrow my eyes at him.

“Remember what you had to do to blow up her life?”

“Yeah?”

“Well, why not take it further?”

I don’t speak. I don’t think I trust Jones right now.

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