Page 92 of Someday You Learn

“Damn. What’s that feel like?”

“Certainty?” I nod as she stares out at the water. “I guess it just feels a lot like the opposite of regret.”

“Like you’re afraid of regret more than taking chances?”

“Yeah. I told you before that my mom always reminded me not to live with regrets, so I guess in those moments I’m unsure about something, I think of her, try to hear her voice speaking to me.” She closes her eyes and I watch as she lets her memories take over. I know what that’s like. I do that sometimes with my dad—try to hear his voice, remember his smile, what he smells like, or a memory that comes over me at unexpected times.

Cashlynn’s eyes pop back open as she looks at me. “So instead of being afraid, I leap—even if I hesitate at first. Lord knows, I’ve put off this gallery idea for a while, but then something just clicked for me.”

“What was it?”

With our eyes locked, she says, “Meeting you.”

Fuck.

I stop walking and pull her into my chest. Cupping her cheek, I lean down and slowly press my lips to hers—because hearing her admit that I’m the reason she faced her fears makes me feel like maybe she’s the reason that I can finally face mine.

When we part, her eyes open slowly as she stares up at me. “What was that for?”

“For being you. The way you look at me…” I inhale deeply. “It’s unnerving sometimes.”

Her lips quirk into a smile. “Right back at you.”

I press another chaste kiss to her lips and then tug her forward again. “I’ve forgotten how much I love the feeling of the sand between my toes.”

“Really?”

“Yeah. I hate to admit it, but I haven’t been down to the water in ages.” I drag my foot in the sand to my side. “You’d think living here for practically my whole life I’d take advantage of it, but work has always been the priority.”

“When you have something at your fingertips, it’s easy to take it for granted.”

I nod. “I agree. In fact, I remember when I was in college in California, every time I came home to visit, the water was one of the first places I’d go. Now I don’t come down here nearly as often as I’d like.” I cast my gaze out at the water.

“Well, maybe it’s time to change that.”

I look down at her, feeling a shift in my chest. “Yeah, I’m beginning to realize it’s time I change a lot of things.”

***

“So, Parker, how have things been in the last week?” Dr. Jensen has her pen and notepad ready to go, eager to make notes as I unload everything that’s been going through my mind in the last seven days.

I rub the back of my neck. “Well, I took Cashlynn out on a date.”

Dr. Jensen perks up in her seat. “And how did it go?”

I think back to the way Cashlynn made me feel at peace while we walked along the beach and talked about any and everything. We watched the sunset like I planned, and when we got home, I ravaged her body, showing her what my mind and heart won’t let me say yet.

“I’m falling fast for her. But…I haven’t been sleeping well.”

“Still having those dreams about Sasha?”

Leaning back against the couch, I run my hands down my thighs. “Yeah.”

“Were the dreams the same as the ones you described to me last time?” she asks.

“Two of the nights they were, but the other night…it was different.”

She jots something down. “Tell me about it.”