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The need to have Ivy give voice to what was bothering her was an ache that throbbed within him. Maybe that was why he kept asking her if she was all right, and if they were all right. He knew his fucking wife. Understood that on some level an internal war was raging. It had to be. She was all logic and facts. Science was her first love. Now he was asking her to ignore it. So yeah, Emmanuel kept asking.

“I’m asking because I want you to be honest with me. Please.”

“How can I be? Huh?” Ivy wrung her hands together. A pool of unshed tears distorted the colour of her eyes. “How do I tell you, that despite the fact I believe you with my whole heart. Because I do. I know you. The man that you are. The facts. The facts do not lend themselves to that belief. So, in spite of my best efforts. I can’t keep the doubt at bay. I don’t know how.” The pool of tears found their escape as they meandered down her cheeks.

Christ.Her pain was palpable. For the first time, he wondered if his instinct to comfort her was right. Emmanuel pushed down the errant thought. He wiped away her tears. Then he pulled her into his embrace. “I’m so sorry, Doc. I know this has been hell on you. You don’t ever have to be afraid to tell me anything. How you feel. I… get it. Your feelings are valid.” His large hands drew comforting circles on her back. She sobbed quietly as he held her.

“Manny, I have something to tell you.”

“Yeah.”

For a moment he thought that she wasn’t going to speak. Ivy burrowed herself deeper into his embrace. “Today. I, uh. I gave way to the doubt.”

Emmanuel remained quiet and waited for her to continue.

“I had a panel drawn for STIs.”

His first instinct was to let her go because her words clawed at his insides. Her doubt was one thing. It was perfectly natural. It was something entirely different to act on it. The very act implied, not only did he risk the life that they built together… but he put her in danger.

“Manny, say something,” Ivy implored as she pulled away.

He hadn’t realised that he was crying until he felt her wipe his tear away. God, he didn’t mean to be a selfish prick. He shouldn’t be hurting her. But the fact that she’d taken the test. Not just that she had taken it, but without speaking to him about it first… triggered pain to blossom in the pit of his stomach.

It caused Emmanuel to take an involuntary step back. He’d somehow convinced himself that he could handle her feelings. Ivy would tell him how she felt, and they would work it out together. An STI test never entered his mind. Now the fact that she’d already taken one… was an open wound.

Wait! Ivy had taken a test. Did that mean… she wanted him to take one too?

Chapter Eight

REALLY DOC?

“I can’t believe you’re still dragging your feet. I am stopping by your office today and drawing the sample myself. You are a doctor for God’s sake!

Your health and well-being should be paramount to you.”Kimberlin had been making the same argument for weeks. Her heart was in the right place, but it only added to the war between instinct and logic. Kimberlin had finally worn Ivy down.

Regret.

Regret pierced her. Seeing the pain on Emmanuel’s face was almost too much to bear. Ivy could recall every time she had seen her husband cry. Mostly, they all surrounded their children. Moments of joy. The announcement that he was going to be a father or holding them for the first time. The only moment of sadness Ivy could recall was when the doctor announced that her third pregnancy wasn’t viable. Manny had hidden away in their closet after he thought she was asleep. So, wiping away his tears was heartbreaking.

Maybe it was for the best that she hadn’t told him beforehand. Ivy would have talked herself out of it. She had been so lost in her thoughts, at first, she hadn’t heard him.

“Ivy.” When her gaze met him, he continued. “Did you also want me to take a test?”

Yes.Ivy figured if she took one, he should go ahead and take one as well. It was what was best. Having to actually tell him that was another matter altogether. The words wouldn’t come. Finally, it was Manny who broke the silence.

“I see.” He nodded slowly in acceptance. “I’ll stop by a lab tomorrow.”

It was on the tip of her tongue to offer to do it herself, but a haunting look of despair crossed his features. So, she shut down her request.

“I’m going to head up and take a shower.” He was already walking towards the entrance of the kitchen.

“Your plate is in the warmer. And there is lots of cake.” Ivy attempted to inject false cheer into her voice but was certain she failed monumentally.

“I’ll be back down after my shower,” he called over his shoulder.

Ivy removed the cakes from the oven when the timer went off and placed them on the cooling rack. Snap. She hadn’t finished the icing. Vanilla Bean? Why had she even brought out the Vanilla Bean? This recipe didn’t even call for it. What she needed was a fresh lime?—

Fuck!!Ivy raced from the kitchen. Her speed would have made a sprinter proud. By the time she slowed as she entered their bedroom her breaths were coming in short, sharp puffs. A quick scan showed that the bedroom was empty, so she went to the bathroom but stopped short at the entrance. Manny stood frozen and naked. From the look of things, he hadn’t showered yet. He held the bag from the pharmacy in one hand and the contents in the other.

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