Page 45 of The Wrangler Takes a Wife

No! This couldn’t be happening! Amara can’t be pregnant with my baby.

Chase couldn’t bring himself to speak to her. Her nervous smile eventually crumbled. While her eyes filled with trepidation.

“Chase?” Her bottom lip trembled. “Please say something.”

There was no way he could tell the woman he loved that the idea of her carrying his child wasn’t joyous. In fact, it was the opposite. Terror and bile swirled in his stomach.

“I don’t know what to say.”

“We obviously didn’t plan this pregnancy, but I was hoping we could work through this surprise together.” Amara reached her hand out to him and all he could do was stare at it.

Shaking his head, he stood up. “I’m sorry. I need to get out of here.” Justfor a moment. Tell her you’re coming back.

“Fine, go ahead.” Amara was closing off before his eyes.

The panic clawing at his insides prevented him from comforting her. He didn’t remember putting on his boots. The soft thudof the door closing behind him was amplified. He stood on the porch for a moment. Despite his best efforts, he couldn't bring himself to go back inside and beg for her mercy. Nor explain how terrified and undeserving he felt.

Chase saddled his horse. It might help clear his head. He rode for a while before just feeling emotionally exhausted. Stopping his horse, he unmounted. His thoughts were overwhelming. Losing Amara wasn’t something he could live with. He knew without her saying it; she wanted the baby. He couldn’t be a father. Not with his history.

He saw his truck approaching. Other than Ryan, Amara would be the only person brave enough to touch his truck. Ryan wasn’t around. So, she had come looking for him. The least he could do was speak to her. Stopping nearby, she got out of the truck and walked in his direction. She stopped walking his way. For a moment she didn’t say anything, she just looked around at the landscape.

“All of this hasn’t been easy for me. You and I.” Amara looked up at the sky. “I have a habit of cutting people off, especially when they do me dirty. But after what happened with Harvest Construction, we decided to really give this marriage a go. I made a commitment to talk things out with you and not to jump to conclusions. When you walked out after I told you I was pregnant, I was like, fuck him. Then I realized letting you walk away was another way of cutting you off. Trust me, I considered it. But it isn’t just about us anymore. It wasn’t easy coming after you. Especially when you walking out hurt like a motherfucker, but I deserve better. And answers.”

“I know you deserve answers. They aren’t easy to give you.”

She was being much braver than he was right now. Chase felt ashamed of his actions. However, he had to man up. “I did things, Amara. I received commendations and medals for taking the lives of little boys who were forced to use firearms and be soldiers before having the chance to shave. How can I possibly be a good father? How do I even deserve to be a parent?”

Amara closed the steps between them, but didn’t touch him. She pressed her hand to her chest. “Oh Chase, the fact you carry the pain of taking those lives when you were more than justified tells me what a good man you are. You deserve a family. I know you will be a great dad.”

“I don’t know if I’m deserving of it. I’m not sure if I can be a parent, Amara.”

“Finding out I was pregnant took me by surprise. There are things I’m nervous about, too. I was never one of those women who was eager to become a mom. Becoming a parent is a big deal, with lots of responsibility. It’s one that I really want. I don’t want to do this by myself, but I will if I have to, Chase.”

“I don’t want you to do it by yourself, either. I want to be by your side through everything.” Her father’s words came back to Chase. Marriage was a choice you made every day.

Amara reached out her hand, and Chase took it. How could he not? She was fighting for them. He would fight alongside her.

“As long as you are willing, we can work through these feelings. Listen, we are badasses. I can’t imagine us being anything less than phenomenal parents,” Amara declared.

Chase smiled for the first time since he heard the news. He pulled her into his arms. He wouldn’t allow anything to destroy what they had. It was possible to overcome his feelings of guilt.He’d done it before. It might require some outside help. But he had an entire network of people with resources which could help him get past this.

“Hey, Chase. Is it your only reservation about me being pregnant? You’re not secretly worried I’ll get big as a house and stay like that.” There was laughter in her voice, but she shouldn’t have had to ask, even in jest.

“God no. I’m sorry I even made you entertain those feelings. Now that I think about it, I’m looking forward to seeing the changes being pregnant will bring about. He cupped her ass, giving it a squeeze.

“So, you aren’t worried I’ll love the baby more than you or some shit.”

“No, Sweet Darling. I was afraid the darkness disqualified me from being a good parent.”

“The darkness qualifies you more than most.”

“I love you, and I’m sorry for my reaction. Hurting you… was never my intention.”

“I know, otherwise I wouldn’t be here.”

They held each other until he felt her shiver. The sun was setting and with the rays gone, the breeze became cold. It was time to head home.

Chapter Seventeen

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