Page 28 of Playing with Fire

Nodding, Beckett watched as Nate stuffed his laptop into a bag and straightened his tie. “Sounds like a blast,” he snarked. When Nate shot him a glare, he held up his hands in supplication. “Just think about taking your own advice sometime, Nate. It seems like you’re sacrificing a whole lot of living for your job.” Nate flipped the bird before silently heading out of the apartment.

Well,thatdefinitely hit a nerve and Beckett made a mental note to talk to his brother more about it later, maybe with a little less judgement in his tone next time. Glancing at the clock, Beckett saw that Willa would be arriving soon, so he rushed into the bathroom to grab a shower. Washing off the day had never felt better, and as the hot water slid down his sore muscles, he felt his posture start to relax and the tension slowly slide down the drain along with the soapy bubbles of his shampoo.

After toweling off and slipping into a pair of sweats, he padded out into the living room in time to hear a soft knock at the door. Smiling for the first time that day, Beckett opened the door to a beaming Willa who stood holding a pizza box and staring at his bare chest with interest. As soon as her eyes traveled up to his face, however, her smile dimmed ever so slightly.

“What’s wrong?” Willa’s melodic voice was tempered by the threads of concern woven into it as she stepped through the door.

Grabbing the pizza box, Beckett slid it onto the entry table and pulled Willa into his arms, breathing in her sunshine scent and letting it drive away the last of his worries. “Nothing now that you’re here.” When he pulled back, he could tell that Willawas not convinced by his words. “It was a bit of a rough shift,” he admitted with a shrug.

Willa’s brow furrowed and Beckett wanted to smooth out the little vee that had formed between her eyes, but before he could she was wrapping him up in another tight hug, her hands running up and down his back in soothing circles. His body relaxed almost instantly at the tough, the skin-to-skin contact just what he needed, “Tell me about it,” she commanded.

“Are you sure you want to know?” When Beckett looked down at her again, he saw a somewhat irritated expression on her face.

“Of course I want to know, Beck.” Intertwining their fingers with one hand and nabbing the pizza box with the other, Willa dragged him over to the couch. As soon as his butt hit the cushy black leather, the tiredness he had been holding at bay all day long started to settle into his bones. Grabbing a soft throw blanket, Willa draped it over his lap before gently touching his cheek. “You always take such good care of me. It’s my turn to take care of you now.”

Willa strode into the kitchen and rummaged around for plates and drinks. The whole time she was there, Beckett focused on her, marveling at how she had offered to do for him what he did for just about everyone else all the time. Most people saw him as this big, strong man who could take care of everything and everyone, and Beckett liked to think that was still true, but it was nice to know that someone saw that he didn’t always want to have to be that. Sometimes he needed to take a little something for himself and the fact that Willa wanted to give it to him had Beckett teetering over the fine line he’d been walking all month before falling completely into being in love with her.

When Willa returned to the couch, she plated up a slice of veggie pizza for him and passed it over before grabbing her own. “You don’t have to talk about it if you don’t want to, but I think itmight help,” she advised.

The warmth in her voice soothed the last of Beckett’s frazzled nerves and he started to fill her in on his day. As they ate, he told her all about the calls he’d had to go out on, leaving out unnecessary details while making sure he didn’t hold anything back that would keep him from feeling better. By the time Beckett finished, the pizza was gone, his belly was full, and his head was on Willa’s lap as she ran her fingers through his hair. It felt like he’d purged every awful thought and feeling from his mind and body, his breathing coming easier as her nails scratched lightly against his scalp.

Willa made a soothing noise as she continued her ministrations. “I’m so sorry, Baby. That’s awful.”

Beckett’s mouth ticked up at the endearment. “It was, but I feel a lot better about it now.” Blinking up at her, he brushed his fingers against her cheek. “Thank you. I can handle the job, but it’s nice to have someone to talk to about it.”

Willa nodded. “You’re welcome.” She leaned down and kissed his forehead, the last of tension dissipating at the sweet touch of her lips. “Do you not talk to your family about this stuff?”

“Occasionally,” he admitted quietly. “We’ve always been open with our emotions, but sometimes I wonder if they only see me as the strong one. The one who can take the hard stuff without needing anything in return.” Looking up at Willa with a sad smile, Beckett shrugged. “I also wonder if I don’t like it that way. When people call you a hero on a regular basis, it’s hard to not keep all the mental anguish the job can cause to yourself, try to leave it at the station and not bring it home with you.”

Willa nodded thoughtfully, eyeing his face. “That makes sense, but I don’t want you to worry about that with me.” The hand that wasn’t currently tangled up in his hair cradled his jaw where she ran the pad of her thumb along the stubble that wasjust starting to come in. “I can handle carrying that with you, Beck, but more than that, I want to,” she vowed. Her warm hand moved lower, coming to rest over his heart. Beckett didn’t know if it was a silent promise to carry his heart as well, but he hoped so.

Closing his eyes and enjoying the weight and softness of her hand on him, Beckett filled his lungs with her comforting scent as he let her words settle over him. “If anyone can do it, it’s you Wild Woman.”

Whether he was referring to her ability to help him carry his work burdens or her capacity to hurt him deeply if she wanted to, he wasn’t yet sure. Willa wouldn’t do it on purpose, of course, but the possibility that she could break his heart was something he had considered often enough. Beckett wasn’t entirely sure if she was aware of the fact that of the two of them, she was the one that held all the power. That was what happened when someone fell madly in love with you. They gave you their power and he had definitely given her his. He would do it again and again each time too.

As Beckett lay in the cradle of her lap, his eyelids grew heavy and he started to feel himself drifting off to sleep, but he didn’t bother to move. Even with the prospect of what they shared not being a forever kind of love like he wanted it to be, with Willa watching over him the way she was, Beckett felt safer and more cared for than he had in a long time. He just hoped that the heart she held in her hands was as safe as the rest of him.

Chapter Eighteen

~Willa~

In Willa’s world, Saturday night had always been the typical date night, but as she was currently with a man who didn’t exactly work the typical schedule, Willa never knew when to expect she and Beckett would go out on a date. Whenever they did, whether it was a Tuesday afternoon or a Thursday evening, however, she always had a wonderful time. After the other night, when he fell asleep in her lap and she passed out soon after, Willa and Beckett woke up in the early hours of the morning and moved into his bedroom.

Sleeping next to Beckett had gotten a lot easier, mostly because Willa had been having the most restful sleep of her life since giving into the desire to lay next to him all night long. His body acted as her own personal space heater, the warmth radiating from his skin lulling her into a dream state so peaceful that when she awoke, Willa cursed the need for money and work because she wanted to do nothing but stay in his arms for the rest of the day. Since those thingswerenecessary, she would instead kiss him goodbye before heading off to Town Hall where he inevitably found her for lunch and they would share a meal, good conversation, and a few kisses that held the promise of more.

It turned out that more would be happening later on that evening. The text from Beckett telling Willa that he wanted to take her out for a special night had been a pleasant surprise, but just because it was the weekend didn’t mean he was doing anything she might not expect. Special could mean just about anything, most notably because every moment with Beckett had felt more than special. Even the times when Willa felt triggered and he had to talk her down from the dizzying heights of a near panic attack, or when he’d had a rough day and was in need of alittle TLC, Willa felt so connected to him, so cherished that the good far outweighed the bad.

Still, special meantsomethingand she wanted to make sure she was dressed for the occasion. The only information Willa had been able to needle out of her date for the night was that they’d be outdoors, so she should wear something comfortable. Most of her wardrobe still consisted of the thrift store finds that had been agitated and tumble-dried to the point where they were beyond comfortable, but that had also made them look a bit threadbare. Hence her current location of a little boutique shop in downtown Applewood.

Lottie hummed as she flicked at different clothing items on the rack in front of her. “No, no, no,” she grumbled. Growing increasingly frustrated with the selections, she moved to another rack and started her search all over again. “None of these fit your style.”

Chuckling, Willa sifted through her own rack and pulled out a yellow floral number before quickly dismissing and replacing it. “And what is my style? Thrift store chic?” Passing on another few dresses, Willa moved to the rack that Lottie was currently scowling at.

“No,” she chastised Willa. “You have that whole bohemian goddess thing going on. Like a hippie from a bygone era, but one that actually embraces indoor plumbing and deodorant.” Willa laughed at Lottie’s description of her personal aesthetic, before covering her ears at the high-pitched squeal of delight Lottie belted out as she pulled out a white, flowy dress with bell sleeves and nothing but lace covering the back. When Lottie held it up to Willa, she smiled brightly, waggling her eyebrows at the hemline that would barely hit below where her ass would be. “Perfect.”

Snorting, Willa pushed the beautiful cotton dress away from her. “Yeah, if I were a few inches shorter maybe. One stiffbreeze and I’ll be flashing anyone within spitting distance.”

Lottie shrugged and pushed her toward the changing room, dress in tow. “So what? Just wear some cute undies and you’re golden.” When Willa halted her steps and turned with a withering look, Lottie sighed. “Will you just try it on, please? Beckett’s eyes are going to pop out of his head like a cartoon wolf and then he’ll take you back to his place and ravish you like he’s some reformed rake from a historical romance.”

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