Page 146 of Veil of Death and Shadow

The street was dark, nothing but the soft glow of the moon highlighting the generally drab scenery around us. If people were living in the area, they’d likely be asleep.

“Thanks.” I hunched over, trying to catch my breath. “That was close. Good, you know,” I waved my hand in his general direction, “guardian-angeling and what not.”

When I looked up, expecting to catch Kieran’s familiar smirk, I found his face a blank mask instead. His attention was locked on Thorne, the two of them tense and coiled like predators just before a strike.

“What the fuck were you thinking?” Thorne shoved Kieran, his face contorting in disbelief. “Never mind,” he shook his head, “you’re clearly not thinking at all.” He started to walk away, then, after a few paces turned back, one hand buried in his hair as the other reached out in front of him. “That was it, Kieran. That was the bloody moment. You just had to stand there and let her fucking die. Better yet, she’s right there—” He flung his extended arm in my direction, an exasperated look in his eyes. “Just shove your hand into her chest and end it now. You’ve done it ahundred times before. What the hell is it about this girl that you suddenly can’t complete one simple job?”

“Kieran.” My mouth went dry, and my stomach dropped as I watched the two of them square off. My lungs refused to let me take a full breath, like my whole body knew before I did where this was heading. I licked my lips and tried again. “What is he talking about?”

Kieran opened his mouth, searching for an excuse that wouldn’t come. He saw the realization crystalize on my face as he took a step towards me. “Agony?—”

And for once, I felt the full force of that nickname, like a dagger buried deep in my back.

The silence was broken by a dark, ragged chuckle. It lingered in the air between us for a moment, before I realized it was my own.

“You’re not a guardian angel, are you?” The question sounded ridiculous to my ears as I asked it. “No—” I shook my head, the truth suffocating me with every passing second, “there’s no such thing as guardian angels.” I fell back against the apartment building, letting it hold up the weight my legs no longer seemed willing to. My breaths came out loud and harsh as I studied the two of them. “Of course not. I’m just an absolute idiot.”

I tilted my chin towards Thorne, his frustration with Kieran making so much sense now. “You’re like him, right?” What had he called it? “A reaper?” My voice didn’t even sound like my own anymore. It was hollow and tinny as it echoed inside of my head. “You’re not here to protect my life.” When I finally brought myself to look up, Kieran wouldn’t meet my eyes. “You’re here to end it.”

26

MAREENA

Present Day

It was a strange feeling, knowing that after all this time, Death was going to win.

Of course, I always knew that was how my story would end eventually. It was how everyone’s story ended. But there was something about the incontrovertible promise of it, thenowness, the confirmation that I was going to die soon—probably already should have died, from the sound of it—that had my head spinning like a top before finally fizzling into a steady, sobering clarity.

Kieran was in front of me, saying something. His lips were moving, but all that I could hear was the rush of my own blood through my veins.

I was going to die. And I had two reapers haunting me to prove it.

“No,” I said. Not yet. Not until I helped Sora. If Death was going to take me, he would have to wait until I finished what I started. I wasn’t giving up until I was certain she was safe. I owed her that much.

Fueled by the kind of raw conviction I suppose only came with the acceptance of one last hoorah, I shoved away from the wall and started walking back in the direction I’d come running from.

Fingers gripped my wrist, but I tugged my arm away, flinching at Kieran’s touch. “No. You don’t get to touch me.”

“Agony—”

“And you don’t get to call me that ridiculous name.” I spun around and faced him. “For fuck’s sake, Kieran, a few hours ago your head was buried between my legs. Last night, you slept in my bed—” I winced, then pressed the heel of my hand into my chest, as if that might somehow rub away the ache that bloomed there, “and this whole time you were lying to me. Is that what this was? A quick fuck while you were casually just waiting for me to die? Do you have any idea how irredeemably fucked up that is?”

“Jesus, mate,” Thorne winced. “That is low, even for you.”

I shot Thorne a glare, but he only held up his hands in surrender. My jaw was clenched so tightly that I was certain I was going to crack a tooth. Not that it mattered. Dentistry was the least of my bodily concerns at the moment.

“Mareena,” Kieran started again, his eyes flashing with emotion that I had no interest in dissecting. When I ignored him, continuing my path back towards House of Wrath, I heard him rush to follow me. “You have to understand, I’ve been doing this forever.”

I snorted. “Is that supposed to make me feel better? Do your other charges thank you for their pity fucks?”

“No.” He let out a low, frustrated sigh. “That’s not what I’m saying. I’ve never had a charge who could see me before—let alone one who remembered my face. We aren’t built for this world. We’re not meant to have any kind of foothold or tether to the living. And then I saw you, and you recognized me, and I—I fecking panicked, okay? It seemed way kinder to let you think that I was here to protect you.”

Ignoring him, I picked up my pace, trying to focus on the sound of my steps on the pavement, and not his words.

“It seemed kinder,” he continued, “to help you spend whatever time you had left doing the things that you love—the things that make you feel alive. To help you enjoy your life—revel in it. Isn’t that better than looking around every corner, waiting for whatever the fates have planned? Spending the rest of your life wasted in a panic?”

“Bloody hell, just put her out of her misery,” Thorne muttered behind us. “It’ll take two seconds, just reach through her chest and end it. I don’t understand why you’re still carrying on about this, we have places to be.”

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