Page 11 of A Vow of Wrath and Ruin

“It was nothing,” I whispered.

He smirked. His dimples peeking through his cheeks. “It was much more than that.”

I couldn’t help my drying throat at the memory of what we used to be.

My eyes flitted to Tharan who stood stoically behind me, arms crossed over his chest. A muscle ticked in his jaw as he watched us.

I sheepishly tucked my hand into my pocket. I didn’t want Tharan to see where another man’s lips touched my skin.

“We leave in the morning,” Lucius said. A warning lingered in his voice.

I turned to Amolie and asked, “Are you going with them?”

“I am. But I’ll meet you at the Townhome in Ruska as soon as I can.”

My heart ached at the thought of saying goodbye to my friends. These last few months, we’d grown closer than I could have imagined, and it pained me to see them go.

They filed out of the study, leaving just Tharan and me.

The winter sunset streaked the sky in dull pinks and oranges, gilding the room. Tharan leaned back in his chair, taking a long drag off his cigarette.

“I am not looking forward to seeing my grandfather,” he admitted to the now empty room, closing his eyes as if he could avoid it by looking away. “The man who killed my mother for daring to love someone she shouldn’t.”

Smoke billowed into the air.

I moved closer, sliding into his lap, and gently stealing the cigarette from between his long fingers.

“I know what you mean. I haven’t seen my mother in five years.” A phantom pain radiated through my collarbone at the thought of coming face-to-face with the woman who kept her true identity a secret my whole life. I took a drag off the cigarette, savoring the taste of clove.

Tharan pulled me closer. His warm breath set my skin on fire.

“You know I would go with you if you wanted me to,” he whispered into my ear.

I nuzzled my face into his neck.

“I know, but we do not have the luxury of time on our side.”

“When this is all over, I am going to make you mine in front of the goddess so that our souls can bond for all eternity.” His chest puffed as he held his breath.

“Tharan…” I said, voice trembling.

He cupped my face in his hands. “Yes?”

“I’m scared.”

“Of what?”

“Of a million things. I’m afraid we’ll be separated, and something will happen to one or both of us. I’m afraid I’ll fail at being your queen. I’m afraid our marriage will ruffle feathers in the other courts and beyond. But mostly, I’m afraid I’m not good enough for you.”

His gaze softened. “Oh, Aelia, how could you think that?”

How could I not?

A memory bubbled to the surface.The first time I confronted Gideon about his infidelities.

In my memories I imagined myself smaller than I was and Gideon as a massive figure towering over me. He held my wrists tight against a wall, the cold stone sent a chill down my spine. His brown eyes fixed on mine so I could not look away. He hated it when I looked away. He wanted me to feel his wrath and he wanted to see my pain.

“What would make you think you were worthy of someone like me?”

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