Page 103 of Sunshine

“When you said you’d never been part of a heat before…” Julian cleared his throat. “What did you mean? I know I’m your first omega, but…weren’t you there during the Pack Beneventi omega’s heat?”

He didn’t want me to be part of his heat. That had to be it. He had thought about it and realized I wouldn’t be able to help. I regretted the bite I’d just taken of the roast beef sandwich.

“I uhhh… No.” I cleared my throat and took a sip of black tea, the leaves a little bitter on my tongue. “Mason wasn’t comfortable with me there at all.”

Julian’s face pulled into a frown. “At all? That’s weird. I mean, his alphas had to have smelled like you.”

Heat crawled up my neck, and I resisted the urge to rub my forearms.

“Oh, babe, I’m not trying to make you feel bad.” Julian’s expression went stormy. “They were all assholes for treating you so badly.”

“I know.” I swallowed hard. “But I get it. Heats are a big deal. I’m not going to be mad if you’re not comfortable with me there.”

“Comfortable?” He blinked. “I don’t know what I would dowithoutyou. That’s why I’m asking. I’m worried I’ve pressured you.”

My brain skipped tracks. “Pressured me?”

“Yeah.” Julian nodded, and then inhaled an entire sandwich, buying me time to tell my brain to calm the heck down.

He picked up his cup and drank some tea. “Pressured you into being there. It’s a lot…I’m a lot.”

He paused and searched my face. “I don’t want to hurt you or make you uncomfortable. During my heat I’m clingy and needy. And I don’t want anyone to leave the nest, ever.”

I managed a smile. “That sounds like every heat I’ve read about.”

“Yeah, but when you’re with us it’s different. It’s basically sleep, sex, and snuggles.” He grinned. “The three s’s.”

“What about snacks?” I gestured at his sandwiches.

“I’m not much interested in eating. It drives Logan nuts.” He grinned, not looking sorry at all. “And heaven help him if he leaves the nest because he thinks he has to get something.”

“Well, I’m gonna add snacks to that equation,” I said firmly. He hadn’t been telling me no. He’d been worried about me.

He fiddled with his sandwich. “I just want to make sure you’re not going to hate sex afterward. Or be upset that I made you so sore. You can tell me no, it’s okay.”

I blinked. “I need more elaboration.”

Julian sighed. “In the heat of the moment, you’re going to be riding high on my pheromones. But I don’t want to…wear youout or for you to end up feeling so sore that you get upset with me.”

“Me?” I frowned. “Isn’t that what you have your alphas for? To wear you out?”

Julian cocked his head. “I do. And they will. But I want you, too, Sunshine. I’m going to be demanding you touch me. I’m going to be demanding to be inside you all the time, the same for Logan and Luca. You’re a beta, and your stamina is different.” He looked at me, very seriously. “Betas have come out of heats needing to be hospitalized because no one knew when to say stop.”

“Oh.” I grabbed Julian’s hand. “I’ll take a break if I need to.”

I seriously doubted I would really want to take a break, if our previous sexual marathons were any indication. Julian still looked worried, so I tried to reassure him some more.

“And those stories about hospitalization are usually because there was a combination of other health factors too.”

“Still.” I was happy to see he’d relaxed, some of the worry going away from his face. “I just want you to be as comfortable as possible. If there’s anything I can do—anything you need—tell me.”

I dropped my gaze to where my hand held his and rubbed the soft skin between his pointer finger and his thumb. “It’s not a need, but I’m curious.”

“You can ask me anything, I hope you know that by now.” He grabbed another sandwich with his free hand. “Also, you’re going to have to carb up with me.”

Julian was right. I maneuvered my own sandwich with my other hand. We would probably lose weight during the heat, and it would be easier for all of us if we were eating highly nutritious meals beforehand, to prepare. I’d done a lot of research on betas and heats, and I had a fair idea of what to expect.

Sometimes betas did great. Like Julian said, omega pheromones were potent, and we could ride the waves of lust and need like the alphas. But, biologically, we were built differently and couldn’t always ignore the needs of our bodies in the same way as alphas in a rut could, or like an omega in heat did.

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