Page 60 of Shrine of Fire

“Can I say both?” I couldn’t help but smile. “I’d thought the ship was going to be tight quarters.”

“So, you are not bonded?” Cuan paused. “I didn’t mean to be rude at the banquet. I had assumed…”

I shook my head, my cheeks heating. “We’re not bonded. Yet.”

He cocked his head. “Do you not do a bonding ceremony after the Royal Wedding?”

“Oh, right. Yes.” I gave him a careful look. “I suppose that’s when we will bond as a pack.”

A thunderous look crossed his face, and he took a step toward me. Standing, he towered over me. “If any of these men are coercing you…”

“They aren’t.” I wound the yarn around a flat piece of decorated wood. “It’s complicated.”

I should be more honest with him. I couldn’t tell him about Hella Mora. But I could give him this painful piece of my heart.

“I had a pack before.”

Cuan frowned. “Where are they?”

“Dead.” I swallowed hard. “I’m still grieving.”

“Then theyarecoercing you.” Cuan shook his head. “Allow me to make some preparations. I will take you wherever you want to go, political consequences be damned.”

His concern for my wellbeing and safety warmed me. “I want to stay here. They’re all okay with taking things slow.”

Cuan grunted. “Much of your interactions with Stefan makes sense now. I worried the spirit was driving wedges between you and your pack.”

“No.” I rolled the wool around the card, winding and winding. “It’s me. I’m the wedge.”

“So why agree to an engagement at all.” Cuan’s thunderous expression appeared again. “I tell you, Nova, if they are making you feel as though you must go through with this, I will strangle them with my bare hands.”

I tugged Cuan’s hand and forced him to sit down. “I’m not being coerced. I’m…grieving. Building relationships is hard.”

He studied my face and looked down at our hands joined together. “If that changes…promise you will tell me.”

“I will.” I squeezed his hand again. “Will you tell me why you keep saying it’s such an honor but then you’re rude?”

Cuan had the grace to look ashamed. “It’s…hard to explain.” He regarded me, consideringly, then looked out the window as though to check the time of day or the weather, before asking me, “Will you come somewhere with me? It’s not far.”

“Go with you?” I frowned. “Right now?”

“Yes.” He grinned, his face lighting up with enthusiasm. “There’s still time, if we leave within the hour.”

I studied his face as excitement pouring out of him. He was handsome when he was playing the fool or when he was wearing the bland mask of the courtier, as his face chiseled like the massive rocks that dotted the landscape. But with real emotion on his face, he was positively radiant.

It could be a plan to lure me away to try and hurt me, but I resolved that if he tried that, I would set him on fire.

Despite his behavior before today, I wanted to see what it was that had him so excited. “Let me tell the others I’m going out.”

“I’ll get us some horses saddled.” He paused. “Can you ride?”

“Well enough,” I said.

“Excellent. We’ll meet at the front gate in a quarter hour?”

I went to find one of the men. Aki was in our quarters, and I let him know I was going out riding with Cuan. His raised eyebrow and reminder to “take care of my needs” had me blushing and sent heat curling through my body. I made my way through the fort and out across the courtyard to meet Cuan at the front gate.

He was already mounted astride a broad-chested charger. Beside him, a stable boy held the bridle of a sweet-looking little mare. I took the reins from the lad, gathered them in my hand and mounted, and soon we were riding out from the fort into the highlands. As we rode, Cuan stopped a few times to point out some of the beautiful purple flowers growing thick around standing stones dotting the landscape.