Page 78 of Break

I love giving pain with pleasure.

I hurt her.

I want to hurt her more.

I’m a monster.

The old Kerrington shows up in my head. The one who walked in shame for indulging in my kinks until Landon showed me how to hurt without breaking. How to take without destroying.

I’m a piece of shit. I should have never gone that far. I shouldn’t have liked it so much.

She’s going to hate me for this in the morning.

I know these thoughts are my guilt and insecurities coming out to play. And I know how to deal with my demons now. Reaching blinding for Landon, I use him like a lifeline.

“I’m in a Dom drop,” I say, but my voice sounds far away.

“It’s okay,” Landon says, getting me down on the floor with Nicole. “I’ve got you both.”

Chapter 24

Landon

Well ain’t this some shit.

It’s been forever and a day since Kerrington has gone hard enough to put himself in this position. It’s not that he’s extreme with his sadism, but the man does love to break things. He’s been on a short leash for a long time with me, because he knows I don’t like pain, but I’m kind of proud of him for pushing his boundaries with our girl. At least he has someone to play with that side of him now.

Too bad shit’s gone haywire again.

She’s hiding something big from us. Big enough to make them both challenge each other. And look, I love me some top-tier bratty behavior, but I think she really pushed him over the edge this time. I can’t remember the last time Kerr had a fucking Dom drop. It took a crazy amount of aftercare to get his head on straight, and a lot of convincing on Nicole’s part to show she was not only okay, but loved what they did out there.

I know I fucking did.

But there’s still a huge elephant in the roomwith us. I want to know who this TW person is as much as Kerrington, damnit. Her behavior leads me to believe they’re a threat, not a mutual. The possibility sets my teeth on edge.

Once they were cleaned up and tucked into bed, I went in search of her phone while they crashed. It’s currently three in the morning. The entire world is fast asleep. All but me and the busted cell phone I retrieved from outside.

It’s completely shattered and unsavable, potentially taking Nicole’s secrets to its grave.

“What are you doing?” Kerrington asks in a groggy, raspy voice.

His eyes are a little swollen and his hair is a mess. Shirtless, he crosses his arms and walks over to me.

“How do you feel?” I kiss him gently, just a peck, to comfort him.

“Amazing and awful at the same time.”

Kerrington’s never fully embraced his sadistic side. He fucks me how I like, not how he likes. His view of himself has always been a little skewed. The man has no clue how incredible he is. He just looks at his kinky side as monstrous, I think. Such a shame.

The fact that Nicole has welts on her ass and thighs, scratch marks down her back, and teeth indents on her shoulders probably doesn’t help his guilt trip. It’s a helluva sight.

A stunning one, if you ask me.

“You know she loved it, right?” We talkedabout it earlier while I was cleaning them both up, and the discussion went on and on until Nicole crashed and Kerrington held her tight, as if she was his lifeline, and then he too fell asleep. I’m pretty sure he partially clung to her to make sure she didn’t run away from him in the middle of the night.

Not that I thought for one second she would.

“I’m scared she’s going to regret this in the morning,” Kerrington confesses.