Page 83 of Break

These two men are my weakness. My kryptonite.

My downfall and my salvation.

I think it took seeing Kerrington break down last night, scared to death that he hurt me, for my eyes to finally open wide. They’re not an itch for me to scratch. They’re my heartbeat. The air I breathe. The purpose I’ve been searching for.

“I’ve been in love with you both for a long time.” I’m painfully aware that Kerrington has also now entered the chat. This massive bathroom no longer feels spacious at all. Leaning against the counter, I cross my arms. “I don’t know how to say any of this.”

“Let’s start by getting out of here and into the living room,” Kerrington says, all traces of comfort gone from his tone.

My heart clunks as I follow him out, with Landon behind me. Suddenly feeling like a prisoner being escorted to her new cell, I keep my head down and go back into default mode.

Deny, deflect, and disrespect.

Except I can’t summon the energy to engage. Keeping this last secret has drained me for too long. If I can share my heart and my body with these two men, why not share my burdens too?

“I’m being blackmailed.”

They both become unnaturally still in front of me.

I pretend they’re only statues and pour myheart out.

“After the gala, one particular asshole followed us to the club and took pictures of us. He also got photos of us in the hotel room by the window.”

Landon swipes a hand down his face, likely remembering how he fucked my brains out against said window with my tits smashed against the glass.

“He threatened to post the images of us across all social media and send them to the board of directors at my family’s firm, as well as every client.”

“Jesus fucking Christ.” Landon paces like an angry tiger. “Why didn’t you say something sooner?”

“I was handling it.” The words no sooner leave my mouth when the lie sinks in. I haven’t handled it at all. If anything, I’ve let it eat my self-respect down to the roots. “I didn’t tell you because it’s personal.”

“Howpersonal?” Kerrington growls.

Shame wraps its hands around my neck and starts squeezing. “He…” I don’t think I can say this out loud without breaking down.

“Did he hurt you? Push himself onto you?”

Landon freezes, waiting for me to answer Kerrington’s question. My cheeks get tingly and even my scalp goes numb.

“Why can’t we just go back to breakfast? Or last night?” I beg. “Just forget this bullshit and goback to being happy? It’s going to be fine. I have it covered.”

Kerrington drops to his knees before me and rests his hands on my thighs. “Baby, we need to know what he’s done. We can’t go back to happy until we know you’re safe.”

“Iamsafe. I’m here with you, aren’t I?”

I’m not about to tell them I pay the fuckhead thousands every month for his silence.

“What about Japan?” Landon asks. “What about when you leave us again?”

My heart hiccups and I feel woozy. “I won’t matter after that.”

Kerrington’s brow digs down. He looks like I just punched him in the gut. “Nicole.”

“Don’t,” I hiss, squeezing my eyes shut. “Please don’t press this, Kerrington.”

“Give us his name.” Landon’s voice shakes with anger. “Give. Us. His. Name.”

“Why?” I open my eyes and wish I’d kept them closed. Because the looks on their faces kills me. “Please… I’m not worth the trouble I’ve caused. The press had a field day with me at the gala because they like humiliation. It’s just click bait. I’m okay with that and don’t care. So, you shouldn’t either.”