Page 29 of Another Underworld

Pandora hissed. She clearly didn’t like being challenged. Me? I didn’t mind. As long as it wasn’t blatant disrespect, I was opento listening to my people. Hell, he wasn’t even disagreeing with her… I shot her a glare, and she backed off.

“Tell me your thoughts, please,” I told Tiny.

He cleared his throat and proceeded. “In our group, we have fifty of the most qualified Demon assassins in the Darkness.”

“Bullshit,” Pandora snapped. “Lilith didn’t have the fifty top assassins. I did.”

“Didbeing the operative word,” Tiny reminded her. “They have defected to the Bitch Goddess Cecily.”

Pandora’s mouth opened as if she wanted to say something, but no words came out. Her eyes began to glow red with fury and her body shook. I stood up, crossed over to her and got right in her face.

“If you do anything in retaliation, you will be very sorry. I might not be a gazillion years old, and I might not be up on all the Demon lingo and history, but I’m a badass, and I will rip you a new ass if you so much as look at any of my people sideways. You’ve lost your rights. Losing your mind isn’t going to help you get them back.”

She was going to have to accept that she’d lost everything because of killing my mother. The reality didn’t seem to have set in yet. I waited for her to say something. She, as usual, sat in stony-faced silence.

“Tiny,” I said, making my tone far more upbeat than I felt. “Tell me more, please.”

“As you wish, Bitch Goddess Cecily,” he said, giving Pandora a cagey glance. “We have the assassins. Along with that, we have some of the fiercest fighters in the Darkness. Not to mention, the other camps hold healers, flyers and contortionists.”

I was done pretending I knew shit that I didn’t. I was forty and got past that years ago. Pandora could suck an egg if she thought my questions were dumb.

“Contortionists?” I asked.

“Yes, my Goddess,” Tiny said with a kind smile. I really liked this guy. He was sweet for a Demon. “Those who can move through small and inconvenient places when magic is forbidden. Many use this on the mortal plane to steal priceless jewels and art. It’s very handy.”

For a hot sec, I forgot I was talking to a Demon. But the pride I heard in his voice when he shared how Demons were shady bastards brought me right back to reality. “Interesting.”

“Quite,” he agreed. “So, as I was saying, I do believe that we would be sufficiently covered even without the Angel and the Succubus. Plus, the fruit that Abaddon stole will help expedite healing.”

I wrinkled my nose. “He stole it?” That was news to me.

Tiny gave me a double thumbs up and a grin. “He most certainly did! All the food sources in the Darkness now belong to the God and the God only.”

“Oh, great,” I said with a sigh of relief. If we were stealing from the Big Cock, I was cool with that. I grinned as I realized my morals were suffering. Whatever. I didn’t have time to do a soul search about my faltering standards. I’d mull that over another time.

“Cher, Fifi,” I said, looking over at two of my favorite people. “Are you up for going back, getting the toothpicks and coming back?”

“Of course, My Liege Bitch Goddess Cecily,” Fifi said, emptying her pockets of grenades. “I shall leave a few weapons for you to carry with you. It will give me peace of mind to know you are protected.”

Afewin her mind had a different definition than mine. The crazy Succubus gifted me at least thirty grenades. Again, I wasn’t going to look a gift horse in the mouth. I adored Fifi and she adored me back. We just had different ways of showing it.

“Thank you,” I told her. “You are very generous, my friend.”

Cher dug around in her bottomless Prada bag so as not to be outdone by Fifi. When she came out with a vibrator, I groaned.

“Ain’t what it looks likes,” she said with a grin, observing my expression. “Might look like an electric banana, but it shoots poisonous darts. Can incapacitate even the most powerful Immortal for one minute. And the best part is that the enemy just thinks you lost your marbles pulling out a pocket peter. Little do they know they’re about to be out cold due to your nifty little snatch blaster.”

I was speechless. I called mine BOB—battery operated boyfriend. I’d never heard any of the terms Cher had just so casually dropped. And she wasn’t done…

“Yep,” she said, laying it on the table next to the grenades. “Buzz Nightgear is the way to go when you want to take the bad guy by surprise. No one think a chick stick is gonna knock them on their ass. The portable peepee is genius!”

I just nodded. No words would come.

“Oh!” she said with a wince as she slapped both of her hands over her lady bits. “Do not use it as a tool for sexual pleasure. Getting a poisonous dart all up in your cooter is not a good time.”

Fifi gasped. “You’ve done that?”

“Yeppers,” Cher said with a sad shake of her head. “By accident. Knocked myself out cold in the bathroom at the Grammys. Not one of my finest moments.”