Page 9 of Another Underworld

We’d done the wild thing for three hours and forty-five minutes. That gave us about fifteen to shower and get ready for the meeting. A get-together where I would lay down the law even if it might piss a few people off.

“Crap,” I said, rolling over and falling off the bed. As I lay in an ungraceful clump on the ground, I groaned. “I think you might have crippled me.”

My Demon love gently pulled me to my feet and wrapped me in his strong arms. I hadn’t even seen him move. My spidey senses were sorely lacking along with body control at the moment.

“It would be a good way to go,” he said, kissing my neck and sending shivers of delight down my spine.

“Agreed,” I said, slipping out of his embrace. The Demon was dangerous in all ways. If he kept kissing my neck I’d forget about the meeting. Hell, I’d forget my own name. “We can’t just sit here and wait for the Higher Power. We need to do something. We could be waiting for decades.”

Abaddon pulled his boxer briefs off of the fan and handed me my bra. “This is true,” he agreed. “Plan?”

“Pulling it out of my ass,” I replied, realizing my bra was toast. The hooks were bent and the strap was MIA. Didn’t matter. I had plenty.

I kept my eyes away from the temptation in the bedroom as I took the fastest shower of my life then pulled on some jeans, a t-shirt and my running shoes. Comfort was key when having uncomfortable conversations. I had a feeling my mom, Man-mom, Uncle Joe and Sean were not going to be happy with my idea. The munchkins would most likely lose their debatably sane little minds, but the safety of those I loved and cared about came first. Period.

“You ready?” I asked as I pulled my hair into a high ponytail and slapped on some lip gloss.

“Will there be bloodshed?” he inquired, copping a quick feel of my ass.

“Most likely,” I replied, returning the favor.

“I’m in.”

Uncle Joe had giventhe message to Candy Vargo. When Abaddon and I stepped out of the house, everyone stood on my front lawn. The round of applause accompanied by whoops andhollers we received was mortifying. Abaddon didn’t say a word. He stood beside me stoically. However, I was pretty sure a slight smile pulled at his lips. Man-mom wasn’t clapping. He appeared somewhat uncomfortable. I couldn’t blame him. Just like I didn’t ever want to think about my dad doing the nasty, I was positive he felt the same. My mom tried not to laugh, and my brother gave me a double thumbs up. Pandora stood off to the side, not really fitting into the crowd. Shockingly, the munchkins were strangely subdued.

Of course, Uncle Joe was doing jumping jacks front and center. I kept my eyes averted.

“Congrats, motherfuckers,” Candy Vargo announced. “Glad to hear—and I meanhear—that neither of you idiots is a virgin anymore.”

“Are you always such a smartass?” I asked her.

“Nope,” she replied with a chuckle, tossing me a box of toothpicks. “Occasionally, I sleep.”

Swallowing my laugh was impossible, so I didn’t. I accepted the gift and shoved it into my pocket.

“Kinda shocked either of you can walk, beeotch,” Ophelia said with a wide grin and a hip pump.

I raised a brow and refrained from setting her ablaze. “Thank you for your concern, Jackass.”

Ophelia was around five hundred years old and looked twenty. She had bleached blonde hair and a double D sized chest that she’d paid good money to obtain. She was a crappy actress who had aspirations to replace Vanna White someday. Her pet name for me was Bitch. Mine for her was Jackass… amongst others. She was a pain in my ass. However, the Demon was also loyal as all get out and would have my back in the worst of situations. She’d grown on me like a non-lethal fungus and I’d grown to love the dummy.

Fifi stepped forward and bowed. The stunning Succubus was six feet tall and had a resting bitch face that beat any I’d ever come across. However, this afternoon, she was smiling like a dumb-dumb. She was armed to the teeth and held a grenade in each hand. “My Liege Bitch Goddess Cecily, you do seem to have the talents of a Succubus if the moaning and ear-piercing screaming was anything to go by. Your charming bungalow literally shook on its foundation. Impressive! I commend you! However, I’m pleased you are not one of my kind, or else that aerobic, athletic and very vocal fornication session would have sucked the life force out of Abaddon, and he’d be dead.”

“Mmmkay. I guess… umm… thank you. And how about you put those grenades away?” I suggested, pressing the bridge of my nose and hoping that no one else wanted to chime in on my sex life. “No further commentary on my private activities is necessary.”

Sean raised his hand.

“Is this about the last hour?” I questioned.

“I think you mean four hours,” he corrected me with a smirk.

The look I gave my younger brother would have withered a lesser man. My brother was a brilliant badass—a world-renowned poet, former child TV star, and the head writer of Ass the World Turns, along with being a stoner who very successfully played the stock market. He was also wearing my bathrobe. He seemed to have an aversion to doing laundry.

“So, anyhoo,” Sean went on. “I’d just like to clarify why the munchkins aren’t maiming each other at the moment.”

“Go on,” I said. My stomach tightened and I wondered if another message from Phyllis had come through them.

“Yep, well,” he said, giving the forty little turds the side eye. “I was trying to be nice and invited the kids over for some board games, but they seemed to have gotten into the jazz cabbage.”

---