Page 40 of Consort

I should have left her to it. There’s no need for me to hang around and protect her. But I couldn’t resist hiding in the shadows, enjoying her soft singing and playful imitations of an old fae merchant she once met. It brings a smile to my face, even if the joy is meant for her mother. The stolen moments have keptme going, each one a respite from the cocky nobles and their disturbing fetishes.

I didn’t plan on letting her know that I’d found her. The risk of her fleeing was high, and I didn’t want her to be hurt while searching for a new home. The one they found is remarkably well-hidden. I’d never have considered something habitable could be nestled in such a dense, punishing area of the forest. I honestly didn’t even know that area existed. It’s too far off the path to wander through mistakenly.

I’m curious about who the hideaway belonged to before, but I don’t have the connections with other nobles to ask about it. Bringing it up would draw only attention to it, anyway. For now, it’s best to leave it a mystery.

Butsheis too mysterious to forget. Even though there’s endless work to do, I keep finding reasons to come back to her.

An Alpha wolf could sniff them out.It’s highly doubtful any shifter would be sniffing around this close to the castle.

What if a noble stumbles upon the hideout?They wouldn’t bother trekking up here without a good reason.

What if they’re running out of supplies?It’s safer if they can avoid going out.

I couldn’t find a response to that one. So, I justified myself in gathering some things for them. I shouldn’t have gotten the cloth, but it was beautiful and soft, just like the Omega. Nothing like what I’m washed with in the castle. If I close my eyes, I can still feel her flawless skin beneath my fingertips. It deserves something luxurious.

And I won’t pretend that the blue wasn’t intentional. I wanted her to know if was from me. I want her to know that I’m not as evil as she assumes.

I spent the entire morning perched in a massive tree, eager for her to find the gifts. Seeing the smile on her face when she picked up the washing cloth made the wait well worth it. But myheart sank into the dirt when she changed her mind and stuffed the entire offering back beneath the bush.

Revealing myself was foolish. Did I really think I could bribe her into changing her mind about me? It’s madness. I don’t have time for this. And I don’t need her to like me. There are bigger things to worry about.

Because of my reckless behavior, I’ve had to linger close by for two full days to ensure they don’t run. The time has dragged on and on. Each time she laughs or sings, I long to see her face. Then, I curse myself for my inability to forget her. It’s a brutal cycle of punishment but one that I’ve definitely earned.

I think it’s been long enough. I’m fairly confident they won’t run. Torturing myself any longer isn’t necessary. I snatch the bundle from the bush and start back for the castle. On the way, I pass by the gryphon’s cave and leave most of my coin at the entrance. I don’t need all of it–or any of it, really. There’s a chance that she’ll continue to look over the Omega if she is pleased with the gold.

I leave the discarded supplies outside a small fae village, hoping someone will find them useful. The washing cloth, however, goes in my pocket. She didn’t accept it, but I can’t accept the idea of anyone else having it.

On my way back, I stop by the market for some stiff wine. The queen hasn’t given me any specific tasks since I replaced Mitah. I might as well work on an urgent matter of my own–forgetting about the Omega. With my remaining coin, I buy two large jugs and continue on my way.

The first goes down easily as I wander back to the castle. I try to fill my mind with anything but the little shifter; gryphons, my new magic, my parents… Before I know it, the jug is empty. I look around for somewhere to leave it where it can be used again.

I groan silently, letting my head fall back in defeat when I findmyself in front of the Omega’s ballberry bush.

My mind was a little too distracted. The obsession snuck out and led me back to this familiar spot. Why can’t I just move on? All this power, and I can’t keep myself away from one tiny shifter who wants nothing to do with me.

Well, I won’t be drinking the second jug. Not when I was so careless with the first. It takes a bit of effort, but I manage to shove it under the thorny bush and stumble away before I’m noticed.

She can accept it or not. Either way, I’m done with the wine, and I’m done obsessing over her.

***

Fuck me.What was that wine spelled with? I feel like every tree in the forest took turns whipping me all night. I’m dizzy and nauseated, and this headache is a kind of pain I’ve not encountered before. I don’t remember getting back to the castle, only a flash of calling Folas a pixie dick when he tried to speak to me.

I guzzle down a cup of strong tea, trying to lessen the wine’s effects. Food would probably help, but the more I stare at the pile of pastries the servants left, the more my stomach protests. Perhaps I’ll skip breakfast this morning.

I stand and change my uniform, leaving the sour-smelling one by the tub. Splashing cool water on my face helps with the haziness. But as soon as I begin to feel a little better, I realize I left the same potent wine for the Omega to drink.

Shit!

She’s so small. It could really make her sick. Then she’ll think I tried to poison her. I need to go back and retrieve the wine before she notices it. Not that it would be horrible if she hated me even more. Maybe then I’d let go of this foolish hope of her one day knowing the real me. But the thought of making her sickbrings the nausea storming back in. I need to get rid of the wine before she can drink any of it.

She’d likely never accept it, knowing it came from me. But I can’t take the chance of it making her ill. Plus, I’m not in love with the idea of being rejected again if she doesn’t take it. I stomp back through thorny bushes and trip over hidden rocks and roots at my feet. How I could have drunkenly wandered through this mess yesterday without severely injuring myself is a mystery I’ll likely never solve.

When I get back to the bush, I find that the wine is gone. Only a gap remains where I had shoved the branches aside to make room for it.

My queasy stomach twists as I listen for any sounds of illness–retching, groaning, cursing... But I can’t hear anything over the pounding in my skull. I edge closer to the thicket to listen, willing my headache to give it a rest so I can be sure.

It’s perfectly quiet, no sounds of distress of any kind. I breathe deeply, and my nerves subside enough to think. I need to figure out how to get the wine back before either of them drinks it.

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