Page 45 of Fighting Furry

“Sounds good.” I bounced on my toes, taking comfort in the stance I took when I was about to fight, pushing aside fear and doubts and focusing on anticipation and excitement. I strapped onto the zip line, like I'd seen the others do, lifted my feet, and took off. I mean. I. Took. Off. I screamed at the sudden rush of air, at the way I seemed to be heading right for the trees, at the darkness all around and under me. I screamed once for surprise and fear and then I screamed for joy. I was flying through the dark forest, hurtling toward a complete unknown, but the ride was undeniably thrilling. Before I was ready for it to end, I saw the next platform. I lifted my feet and I landed. I unstrapped and hopped out of the way as Axel hurtled in behind me.

“How was it?” he asked.

“That was amazing. Can we do it again?”

His grin was immediate, his earlier hesitation gone. “Of course.”

So, we went back up the mountain and did it again. There were zip lines all over the mountain and Lara and the others joined us in finding them and trying them out. As the sky pinked toward dawn, we shifted to wolves and ran together in the fresh mountain air.

We returned to the party, human and dressed, as the sun rose. The crowd had thinned, but not as much as I'd expected. “You want to mingle some more, or do you want to go home?” Axel asked. He was standing a few feet from me, still giving me space. I couldn't, in that moment, remember why I'd wanted space.

I yawned and stretched. “I need some sleep. When is the meeting to discuss the valley wolves?”

“Not until three.”

“Then sleep sounds good.”

We walked together back to his house, but he hesitated on the porch. “I asked around and Lucinda has space for you if you'd like to stay there. Her roommate is hiking the pacific coast trail, just left yesterday, or I would have suggested it sooner.”

I hadn't believed him when he'd said no one had space for me. I'd thought it was just a trick, a little white lie, to have me stay at his place, but I'd been wrong. There really had been nowhere else for me to stay and, now that he'd found a place, he was ready for me to leave. Which was good. I needed space. “Great. When can I move in?”

His smile didn't slip, but his jaw tensed the smallest bit. “Today. She's looking forward to you staying with her.”

“That's so sweet,” I said, my enthusiasm forced. “I'll just grab my bag and be out of your hair.”

He nodded, but he didn't move, so I walked past him, my bare arm brushing his, my hand bouncing off his. I tried the door, only to find it locked. He pressed against my back, a whisper away from contact, and fitted the key in the lock. He twisted and pushed the door open. I hurried inside. I needed to get away. I didn't want to leave. I wanted to throw myself in his arms and kiss him until I forgot all the reasons I needed space, but I couldn't do that. Everything was happening way too fast, way too soon, and I needed to use my brain. I needed to remember to protect myself.

“Lucinda's place is two doors down from Krista's.” He was behind me again, so close his words caressed my skin. “I can drive you.”

I was exhausted, ready to drop, but I couldn't be in the car with him, smelling him, having him so close, and not touch him. “It's not that far. I can walk.”

I grabbed my suitcase. It was already packed. I hadn't left anything out, hadn't wanted to make a mess, hadn't wanted to get too comfortable. I rolled it to the door, but Axel blocked my path. There were dark circles under his eyes and his hair was sticking up in every direction. He hadn't shaved since we'd gotten back to town and he was looking every bit the mountain man I should not be attracted to, should not want. But I did want him, more than I'd wanted him before. I wanted to wrap my arms around him and kiss his neck, taste his saltiness. His lips moved, lips I wanted to taste, and I realized he'd spoken and I hadn't heard a word he'd said.

“What?”

I expected a cocky smirk, expected him to call me out on watching his lips and not listening to him, but he just looked sad. “You can't lug that suitcase all the way to Lucinda's. Let me drive you.”

“What are you doing?” I asked, too tired to pretend I didn't want to know.

He didn't pretend confusion. Maybe he was too tired for games, too. “I've made it clear how I feel, Julie, but I'm not going to force you into anything. You want space and I'm giving you space. I won't push, won't ask for anything from you, until you come to me, until you decide you want me.”

“I won't see you at all?”

“Only in my capacity as alpha or a coincidental meeting around town.”

My eyes burned. Why did I feel like I was being dumped? This is what I wanted. I shook my head, trying to clear it. I wasn't thinking straight. Couldn't think straight around him. “Thank you,” I said. Because it might feel like I was being dumped, but what he was doing, giving me space to make my own choice was huge. It was one more reason to trust him, to trust he'd never hurt me or try to control me.

His expression lightened a bit. “You can come here and use the gym any time you want. I won't read anything into it. And you can come here to see me any time you want. You're calling the shots now.” He crossed his arms over his chest. “Anything you ask, I'll give it to you if I can.”

I just stared at him, not understanding how he knew what I needed, how he understood that I needed to have control. “Did you hear my thoughts? Did you read my mind?”

“No,” he said, smiling. “I pay attention to what you don't say as much as to what you do say because I want to know you, all of you.”

And I realized I wanted to know him, too. As soon as I'd figured out this wolf thing, as soon as I got my feet back under me, got my confidence back and found my place in the pack, I wanted to get to know him. I wanted to meet him on equal footing and learn his interior as thoroughly as I'd learned his exterior. The realization should have scared me, but I trusted him. I believed he'd never hurt me. He'd proved that to me repeatedly.

“Okay,” I said, unable to bite back my smile.

“Okay?” he asked, his own smile open, if somewhat vulnerable.

“Okay, you can drive me to Lucinda's house.”

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