Page 44 of Never Say Yes To Your Brother's Best Friend

Ouch.I raise my shoulder in a shrug anyway because he’s right. I can’t get mad over him pointing out a truth, and one I’m often quite proud of. Jace wasn’t stubborn, whereas I can be like the good old mule that is the epitome of stubbornness, even though I’m sure mules are freaking awesome creatures in their own right. They can be both too. Stubborn and awesome.

“I’m only maddening because I’m right. And you are, too, by the way. I’m stubborn. Crazy stubborn. I like to think it usually translates more as a good thing. Tenacity can be great. It just means I’m willing to stand firm on what I believe.”

“And you believe proving to me that I’m adorable is worth all of this?”

“I believe proving to you that you’re great is worth all of this and more. I also believe proving to you that I’m going nowhere is worth all of this. I know you’re not trying to hurt me. You’re just a prickly pear because life has taught you that it’s best served up with thorns on the outside to keep the rest of you safe.”

“Ugh, the metaphors. They’re so overused,” he grumbles.

“I apologize for being a walking stereotype. Do you want sausage rolls? When was the last time you ate?”

“I don’t need you to take care of me, Aspen. I thought I’d made that clear.”

“Alright. I can shut the blinds, and you can take care of me then. You can eat my pussy and feed me your cock. I’m absolutely starving, and I can openly admit it.”

“Oh my…” He looks like he’s going to stroke out.

He doesn’t know what to do with me right now. But he’s not the only one. I don’t go around saying wonderfully nasty things like that. Ever.

I’m the one who walks over and shuts the blinds. Then I walk to the door and close it too. It has a lock, which is a great thing since there are people moving around out in the yard. I’m not taking any chances. Once I’m sure the room is secure from anyone seeing in or walking in, I move back to the desk. I strip off my crop top and shimmy out of my jeans. I leave my bra on. It’s one of the few super nice ones I own. It’s black with little rosebuds all over it, and it’s trimmed out in expensive-feeling lace. I have the matching panties somewhere, but I forgot to pack them, so I settled for plain black because it kind of matches.

I sit down on the edge of the desk and try not to fall over due to my useless legs as Rick’s eyes scald the shit out of me.

He leans back in his chair and feigns disinterest, but I can already read him. I know better. I know that when he starts putting on a show of not wanting me, that’s exactly the time when he does.

I watch the muscles in his jaw jump as he clamps it down. I spread my legs a little further apart, trying to be sexy. I’m probably failing, but as far as seduction goes, I’m pretty inexperienced.

“We shouldn’t do this.” Rick’s voice is iron. His jaw is iron. His eyes are hard but not cold. Rather, they’re ten thousand degreesof molten hot heat. If I was the stove and he was the spaghetti sauce, he’d be burned, burned, burned by now.

That was the last thing I tried to cook at home before I left to come here. And let’s just say the sauce didn’t turn out as expected. I kind of walked away thinking the burner was on low when it was on high, and things got roasted and blackened like I was using a smoker and a barbeque instead of a regular old stove.

“It’s only going to make things harder,” he adds after a slow inhale. I know he’s doing his measured breathing thing. It’s another trick of his. I like that I can already tell these things about him after just a few days together.

“On who? On me? I don’t think so.”

“I think so. You seem like you value commitment. You seem like once you get attached, that’s it.”

“You’re right.” I widen my legs a little bit more until my thighs start to burn a little, and then I go a little bit further. Rick’s eyes shoot straight down between my legs for just a fraction of a second before he jerks them back up. He quickly looks toward the window, but the blinds are closed, and I know he’s seeing nothing. “I do value commitment. And I do get attached. There’s nothing wrong with that. But sexually? That’s something we can work out later if we want to.”

“But we’re not going to want to. We’re not because it’s not—”

“Allowed? I think it’s perfectly allowed,” I say.

I slide my bra straps down my arms and then roll the cups down and undo it from the back before dropping it on the floor. “I’ve said this before, and I’ll say it as many times as it takes. The only thing that matters is if you want this right here and now.”

“That’s not the only thing that matters.”

“Let’s say it is.”

“You know I want you. I want you, and that’s the problem. I’ve always been someone who can go without. I’ve denied myselfeverything in the past and also been denied everything.” He’s genuinely and wildly perturbed about this. Uncomfortable, just like before.

Maybe I should be uncomfortable with my own lack of control. I should be afraid of how this man and I seem to be more than fire and gasoline, but I refuse to be. I refuse to let fear and doubt have their way with me. When I was younger and had less life experience, maybe. No, I didn’t say sex experience. I said life experience. And in the past year, I’ve had plenty of that.

“No one is denying you this. No one is denying you a friendship after and maybe more,” I tell him.

He sighs. “But that’s the problem. You want more.”

“I don’t want it, Rick, not the way you mean. I just want us to have a good life. I want us to be friends. I want to care about you, and I’m not going to just leave, and that’s it. See ya later, alligator. This is all over. I don’t care anymore, and I’m switching off everything. I want more than a line of communication. I’m open to so much more. I want to do all that without hurting each other.”

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