Page 72 of The Forever Play

Grinning, I resist the urge to ask how his sister is, worried that it might lead to the serious conversations I’m trying to avoid, and instead pick another word.

“Shake.”

“Shake it off,” he sings, and I laugh, pointing at him.

“You’re such a Swiftie.”

He goes red while trying to deny it. “I am not. I just knew thatyouwould know that song, even though you’d get all the lyrics wrong.”

I gasp at his teasing and go to poke him, but he grabs my finger. So I use my big toe, sticking it into his firm abs. Holy shit, he’s all muscle.

He snatches my ankle, holding me with ease while that thrill I’ve been trying to deny races right through me again. Ignoring any sensible warnings, I lunge forward with my free hand and a riotous giggle… and we quickly start a playful tussle that is so familiar, I’m taken back to my junior year of high school.

I’m not twenty-one anymore, I’m a loved-up seventeen-year-old who is laughing as my boyfriend tries to tickle me and I wriggle against him.

Squirming on the couch, I yank at his wrist, yelping when he pulls my leg and tries to tickle my other side.

We flop onto the floor with a raucous thud, both laughing as I land on Zander’s chest with a soft “Oof.”

The momentum rolls us over, and I’m soon lying beneath him, squished against the coffee table, my giggles fading to oblivion as I gaze up into his beautiful face and feel every inch of him. His washboard abs are resting against my stomach, his hips pinning me to the floor. His arms are on either side of me, encasing me with his strength while his fingers lightly cup the top of my head. It feels so damn good to be under him again, covered by him, owned by his every breath.

His laughter disintegrates, too, his eyes searching mine like he’s asking for permission to kiss me.

Oh shit. Yes! Yes, please! Kiss me until I can’t breathe!

No, Sienna! He can’t kiss you! He’ll break your heart again. Don’t let him do it!

You’ll go falling headfirst, and then he’ll leave and you’ll be destroyed.

Think of Zoey!

Temptation thrums through me as he lowers his head, his nose gently skimming mine.

I want him so badly it hurts, but then my stupid mouth goes and ruins it.

“Don’t,” I whisper.

He pauses, his warm breath caressing my skin. “Don’t?”

“Don’t kiss me,” I softly plead, logical thought finally kicking in.

I don’t know whether to be relieved or pissed off.

Zander’s head jerks back, gazing down at me with a mixture of surprise and hurt. “You don’t want me to kiss you?”

“I desperately want you to kiss me.” I lick my lips, willing my voice not to shake. “But… you broke my heart, and I barely survived losing you last time. I can’t go through that again. If you kiss me, I’m gonna fall so hard and fast, I’ll be a broken wreck. I have Zoey to look after now. I can’t be nursing a broken heart around her.”

“I’m not trying to break you,” he whispers.

“Then… don’t kiss me unless you mean it.” I close my eyes, licking my lips before rasping, “Don’t kiss me unless you love me and plan to make Zoey and me a permanent part of your future.”

My eyes creep back open in time to see him blinking like I’ve just slapped him across the face.

And there it is.

That look I needed.

Resting my hands on his shoulders, I try to push him off me. “I get it. I’m asking too much.” I push a little harder, grunting to force him up to his knees. Scrambling away from him, I curl my legs to my chest and wrap my arms around them. “I feel like my heart is being held together by sticky tape… really weak sticky tape… and if I’m not careful, it’s gonna splinter.”

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