Page 17 of Saber's Surrender

“Used one of the kids' travel tumblers, thought it’d be easier for you to drink from as we ride,” Saber says and the fact that I can hear him clearly through the helmet is a shocking surprise.

“Appreciate the forethought. Where are we going?” I ask with a little snark in my tone, taking a long, drawn out sip and nearly burning my tongue in the process. My buds are going to hate me later. Shit, I’m not sure where they purchased this canister, but I need to invest in a stock of them if it keeps my coffee this hot.

With a deadpan timbre, he answers with a short, clipped word, “Courthouse.”

“We are, are we?” I inquire. My tone comes across just as sharp as his did.

“Yeah. We are, Foxy. Do we need to put your purse in my saddlebag or are you good with it across your chest like that?”

I look down at my body bag and am thankful that I went with the smaller version because I’m good with where it’s at. If he were to throw one of his temper tantrums, he could keep it locked away and abandon me and I’d be stuck without a phone or any money to get back to the compound. “I’m fine with it where it is, Weston.” If he’s going to toss the name he’s always called meat me, I’m going to return the favor tenfold.

It’s a tit for tat situation and it may be childish, but I’m sick and fucking tired of him going back and forth depending on if he’s pissed at me or not.

I don’t get the reaction I was aiming for—which irritates me. Instead of calling me out on it, he fires up the bike and revs the engine. The jerk! I wanted to get a rise out of him so we could air it out and I could get him to settle on one or the other. It’s driving me to the point of madness. I want to be his Foxy Roxy again, but I’d also settle for only Roxy as long as he sticks to using one and not flipping back and forth.

He’s messing with my emotions. He gives me hope then rips it away from me. I don’t want to go back to that numb place in my mind, it was a deadly place for me to get stuck in. Unfortunately, I feel it rebuilding itself and that frightens me.

We pass Mercy Medical and turn right at the next stop light. The courthouse is on the corner and a smile forms when I take in the architecture. It’s an old-time, gothic structure, much like many of its era is.

I love to travel through older towns and explore these buildings. Some people take Victorian house tours, but I’m an oddball compared to them, I go to courthouses, graveyards, and museums—the older the better. My favorite places to inspect and explore, however, are battlegrounds. There’s so much history to learn about. I’m not only a science nerd who likes to solve mysteries in the human body, but I’m a history buff as well.

“Right up your alley,” Saber says. “Maybe one day you can come back and roam.”

“Maybe,” I respond, hiding my giddiness by shrugging my shoulders as if I could care less. As he shuts down the bike, he swings his leg over and stands, shaking them. I shut the top on my drink and slide off. “Can we store this? I doubt they’ll let me take it inside.”

“Yeah. It’ll keep and stay warm for you to finish when we get done.” He takes it from and puts it in his saddlebag before locking it. “Before we head inside, I want to say a few things.”

“Okay,” I reply, leaning back on his bike and crossing one ankle over the other.

“I want to explain why I’m not making you my old lady on top of marrying you,” he starts off saying. “When we brand a woman, in the eyes of the club, there’s no backing out. It’s forever whereas marriage is just a sheet of paper. There are a lot of issues between us, Roxy. I won’t do that to you or to Canyon. I refuse to stick you into a situation that there’s no escape from. As your husband, what I can promise you is fidelity and respect. Trust may come later on down the road, but as of right now, neither of us are there. Am I right about that?”

“Yes. Trust is a two-way street, Saber. Until we can build a bridge over the ocean of problems we have, it’s not going to happen. I thought about this last night, and even though marriage isn’t the way I believe we should take care of this; I can see the broader picture and know it’s the easiest way to smooth the waters so we can gain custody of the kids.”

“Good analogy,” he snickers. “If there ever was one that explained the shithole we’re in, that’d be it. You doing this for me, it eases some of the pain I’ve felt for so many years.”

“I never did it to hurt you, Weston,” I whisper. “I did it for you, for him, and for me.”

“I know you see it that way, Roxy,” he replies. “But that’s not how it felt then or now.”

“One day, we can sit down and have an adult conversation, Saber. But as you’ve stated, we aren’t there yet. There are still a lot of hurt feelings residing between us.”

“You agreeing to this has settled a lot of those for me, Roxy. And that conversation, we need to have that before Canyon comes into our home.”

“So not only are we going to tie the knot, but we’re going to live together?” I ask.

“Yeah, we are. There are going to be some home visits and it’d look strange if we weren’t living in the same space, don’t you think?”

“I do believe so,” I submit. “Okay, let’s go get that marriage license.”

CHAPTER

ELEVEN

Saber

My steps are lighterthan they have been for years. It didn’t take long for us to get through the line seeing as I went on the computer last night and scheduled us for a time to come and get the license. I was on my way to her dorm to get her when she came strolling out. Was it underhanded to do it without her input? Probably. But in the long run, it worked out and we didn’t end up in an argument over it which I count as a win considering everything lately has led up to a confrontation.

“Look at us adulting and shit,” I laugh.

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