Page 88 of Drunk on Love

“Yes, yes, your mom still thinks the two of us are dating, which is ridiculous. But I get it, I won’t tell the world about your scandalous affair with an older woman who was very recently your boss. But you didn’t answer the question. How was the date?”

He smiled. The date had been so good. And then the rest of the night had been—

“Okay, that smile is quite enough, thank you,” Avery said. “I don’t need to know all of the gory details! But like... is this going to be a thing between the two of you?”

God, he hoped so.

“I think so.” He held up a hand. “Don’t get too excited—I don’t know how long it’s going to last, or really, anything else. We’re taking this day by day.”

Avery looked closely at him.

“You really like her. Don’t you? Like, this is more than just sex.”

“Yeah,” he said. “I really like her. She’s... gorgeous and smart and thoughtful and interesting and—” Avery was grinning at him, so he trailed off. “Anyway. Yes, I like her. But I’m not counting on anything. I’m just going to enjoy this for now, okay?”

Avery still had that smirk on her face.

“Okay. Sounds good.”

She turned to leave, but he stopped her.

“Wait. Avery. How are you doing? Really doing, I mean. No ‘I’m fine’ bullshit this time.”

The smile dropped from her face as she looked at him.

“I’m okay,” she said finally. “Really, I am. The past few weeks have been... hard. Not in the way I really expected, though.”

“What do you mean?” he asked.

She let out a breath.

“The breakup itself obviously sucked. But after that... I thought I would miss him a lot. But I haven’t really, at all. And I’ve felt pretty bad about that.”

He didn’t understand.

“Why have you felt bad that you haven’t missed him? That’s great.”

She looked away from him.

“I mean yeah, it is great. Sort of. It’s felt so good, to be without him. And I’ve felt bad that it’s felt so good, that I’m not a good person, that I should have loved him more, cared about him more. And also, that I should have realized how I felt so much earlier, and that I’m so stupid for not seeing that, and after I did see it, I was so stupid for not doing something about it for so long.” She tried to smile. “I feel bad about one of those two things most of the time, they switch back and forth.”

“I’m really glad it’s felt good to be on your own,” he said. “I just wish you didn’t feel bad about it.” He felt especially guiltynow about things he’d said to her about her ex. “I’m really sorry if I—”

She shook her head.

“It’s not your fault. But the good thing is that every day I feel a little less bad about both of those things, and a little—sometimes a lot—happier about being on my own now. So I really meant it when I said I’m okay.”

He looked closely at her. He could tell she was being honest with him.

“I’m glad,” he said. “You’ll let me know if you need anything at all, right?”

She smiled at him.

“You know it.” She let out a dramatic sigh. “And—look, you know I’m not one for mushy stuff, so I’m only going to say this once—it’s meant a lot to have you here. I know you moved up here only because you were worried about me, and you didn’t have to do that, but it’s been... really great to have you nearby. So. Thanks.”

“You’re welcome,” he said, “but you know you would do the same for me.”

She laughed.

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