Page 139 of Drunk on Love

A server came up behind her, to drop off some bread. She turned, to let him set it in front of her, and then stopped.

Luke was standing there.

“Is this seat available?” he asked, gesturing at the chair next to her.

She was still hurt, and uncertain of him, and angry. But she was so happy to see him, standing right there, so close she could almost touch him, that she had to look away to keep the tears from coming to her eyes.

“I can’t believe you showed up here,” Sydney said.

Sydney glared at Luke from behind the bar. Luke didn’t move. He looked at Margot.

“No, it’s okay, Syd,” Margot said, looking back at Luke.

Luke sat down next to her. Neither of them said anything for a moment.

Sydney came back and slid a glass of water in front of Luke without looking at either of them, and walked away.

“What are the odds she’s poisoned that?” Luke asked.

Margot thought about it.

“Well... not zero.”

They both laughed, without making eye contact.

“How did you know I was here?” she asked.

“I went by your place, your car was there but you weren’t—at least, I hoped you weren’t, because you didn’t answer the door when I rang. It was an educated guess.”

They still hadn’t really looked at each other.

“How was the interview?” she asked.

He shrugged.

“Fine. Good, even. I got the job. I got the unofficial offer this afternoon.” She looked down. Had he come here to tell her that? And then say goodbye? “I’m not taking it, though.”

She looked up at him, trying to tamp down the hope that had risen in her chest.

“Why not?”

She had no idea how he would answer that question.

“Because I hated that job, as much as I tried not to admit it to myself. I thought I just had to work harder, be better, and I would be worthy of it. Quitting that job was the best thing I ever did, and then I beat myself up about it for months.”

She tried to smile.

“Probably better not to go back there if you hated it, then,” she said.

He gave her a tiny smile.

“Yeah, probably.” Then he turned and looked right at her. “I’m sorry, Margot. For... a lot of things. But especially for what I said to you on Sunday morning. About you being irrational, overreacting, that everything is all about you, all of that... that was shitty of me to say. And none of it was true.” She opened her mouth, to apologize, too, but he stopped her. “I didn’t tell you about the interview because I was so in my own head about that job and leaving it and what that said about me as a person that I was scaredto tell you. Scared you’d say something to make it clear you thought the same thing about me that the rest of those people did. That I wasn’t strong enough, good enough, that I didn’t deserve you. I thought I had something to prove, to all of the assholes who doubted me, to you, to myself. I finally realized that’s a really stupid reason to take a job.”

“You didn’t have to prove anything to me,” she said. “I didn’t care about any of that.”

He smiled at her.

“I know that now. It took me a while to realize it, but I did, today. But thank you for saying it. Especially after everything I said to you on Sunday.” He sighed. “I was so caught up in my own ego about that job. I think that’s why I really didn’t tell you about the whole thing with Avery and my mom—I was ashamed of doing it, yeah, but also I knew you would ask why quitting my job bothered me so much that I had to lie to my mom about it, and I didn’t want to answer that question. I was so embarrassed about what I thought of as my failure there, and it made me think there was no way you could believe in me. I’m really sorry that I ever thought that about you. I should have known you too well for that. I did know you too well for that.”

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