Page 98 of Reckless
Her head is crushing my arm.
And I fear I’d never move again if it meant she stayed beside me.
The thought is startling, creeping up from the depths of a feeling I don’t want to dive into at the moment. So, I smother it, content to silently stare up at the sky streaked with pink clouds. The bedroll does little to disguise the feeling of uneven dirt beneath my back, and yet she sleeps soundly beside me. It’s impressive, really.
She danced atop my feet until her eyelids grew heavy, her head slumped against my chest. I lowered her onto my bedroll before she could drool on my only shirt. Now I’m staring at what remains of the braid I wove into her hair, running a finger over the silver strands.
She’s so very deceiving. So Elite in likeness. It’s startling, feeling no power from her.
A sound slips past her lips, soft and sleepy. I fight the urge to wrap my free arm around her, to brush my lips across her neck.
Despite everything, I struggle to not want her.
Something has shifted between us, and yet, nothing at all has changed. She’s the same Paedyn I knew before finding out she was Ordinary. The same Paedyn I knew before she killed the king.
The same Paedyn I was falling for.
And it’s terrifying. Terrifying to know every terrible thing she’s done and still want all of her in spite of it.
I just don’t know if she can say the same for me.
I killed her father, after all. She defended herself against a man I loathed while I murdered a man she loved. And now I’ve chained her to her doom. She is the mission I’m dreading.
She stirs, and I still. When she flips to face me, a blue eye peeks open, blinking in the morning light. “You didn’t wake me,” she grumbles, puzzled.
“I don’t bother trying anymore.”
She laughs sleepily. “I would have thought you’d thrown me over the horse by now.”
I lift the hand she’s not currently crushing and flick the tip of her nose. “Traveling is only fun when you’re constantly trying to escape.”
I drop my hand to see wide eyes blinking at me.
Shit.
Once again, I hadn’t thought about what I was doing until the deed was done.
I haven’t flicked her nose since that final Trial where everything went to hell. That final Trial I was racing to finish just so I could find her on the other end.
I haven’t flicked her nose since I was foolish enough to have feelings for her. Yet here I am, following the same fate. Falling into the same patterns. The same Paedyn.
She clears her throat, suddenly looking very much awake. “Would you like me to keep trying to escape?”
“It is rather entertaining,” I say casually, despite feeling anything but.
“Good to hear. Because I wasn’t planning to stop.”
In one swift movement, she’s grabbed a jagged rock from beside the bedroll and buried it against my neck as she leans over me. “This could do enough damage for me to escape, don’t you think?”
My smile shifts into a grimace when her other hand presses against my hip as she props herself up farther. “Only if you’re able to go through with it,” I manage, blowing out a breath.
Her brows knit together with something deceptively akin to concern. “What happened? What is that face for?”
“Maybe,” I bite out, “it has something to do with the rock digging into my throat.”
“Oh, please, I’m barely putting any pressure—”
She leans her weight against my hip again, and I wince just enough for her to catch the movement. Her eyes dart down my shirt before widening at what they see. “Why are you bleeding?” Her head whips back up toward mine. “And why didn’t you tell me you were bleeding?”
