Page 33 of Pregnant By the Alpha Wolf

Sara nods as Rowan lets out a shaky breath next to me, his fingers stroking my hand, but he seems unable to speak as Sara switches the machine on. The tiny pads on my stomach feel cold as the monitor runs through a series of beeps. Sara frowns and adjusts the pads. The silence growing ever more deafening. I grip Rowan’s hand as I watch the emotion flicker across Sara’s face. Eventually, she turns the monitor around to us, and I see the completely flat lines. I know what that means.

“I am so sorry,” she says, tears shining in her eyes. “There’s no heartbeat.”

I stare at the screen, the pain in my side forgotten as I feel emotion course through my entire body. Rowan pulls my body against him, and I feel his shoulders shaking as he tries to hold back sobs. “No,” he gasps. “No, no, no…”

Sara slips from the room as we rail against our emotions. Pregnancy has been so rare for so long; carrying to term is even rarer. As I stare at the flat lines on the screen, I simply feel numb. Rowan’s sobs slow, and he simply holds me to his chest. After what feels like an eternity, I lift my hand to his shoulder and turn my face, burying myself against his neck and breathing in my mate.

I thought I knew pain and loss, but I’m not sure I did until this moment.

“I’m so sorry I didn’t tell you,” I say weakly, knowing that nothing I say now will be enough. “I’m so sorry, Rowan. You must hate me for this.”

He shakes his head, “Hush. It’s not your fault.” His voice is raw, but he holds on to me like I’m the only thing keeping him grounded. “I will find everyone involved in this, and we will make them pay. I promise.”

I close my eyes as the tears slide down my cheeks, “And then what? Will we kill every hunter in revenge for our child?”

He kisses my forehead. “Yes. Every last one of them will die." His alpha power crackles around the room as I feel his resolve. Silence falls between us before he tilts my chin up and asks, “Why didn’t you tell me, love?”

I take a shaky breath, my eyes returning to the monitor, unable to tear my eyes from the flat lines that signify my baby’s death.

“I was scared,” I admit softly, “I didn’t know how you’d react…or the pack, and I…I needed to understand the DNA mutation. I needed to get my head around it first.”

I can’t bring myself to look at him as I hear him sigh sadly, “I would have been happy, love. So happy. To have a child with you would be more than I ever dreamed possible.”

I lean against him, allowing his wolf to try and calm my grief even as my tears fall, his very essence warming the broken shards of my heart. A soft knock at the door pulls me from my thoughts, and I look up to see Sara peering around the door.

“I’m sorry to bother you both,” she smiles sadly. “The other alphas are here, and the lunas would like to see if you’re okay. I can send them away if you’re not ready.”

I shake my head, “No, it’s okay. They’re my friends.” I wipe my eyes and look up at Rowan. “It’s okay.”

“Only if you’re sure, love,” he replies. When I nod, he tells Sara she can let them in. He then steps back slightly as Kit, Senna, and Kenzie file slowly into the room, grief etched on their faces.

“Oh, Willow,” Senna says, stepping to my bedside and taking my hand. “Sara told us, we are so sorry.”

Kenzie and Kit step forward, offering their condolences, and I allow my tears to fall again. I look at the lunas and feel such gratitude that they are here. I only wish I’d told them about the pregnancy, too.

Rowan squeezes my hand, and when I look at him, I can see how affected he is. Tears glisten in his eyes, making them shine silver, and his luminescent skin glows even more under the clinic lights.

As our eyes meet, I’m suddenly reminded of the conversation I heard between Rian and the hunters after he attacked me. He was saying something about getting rid of all the elders…he mentioned the DNA.

Vampire.

I stare at Rowan, and it’s as though the room and everyone else in it falls away. He looks confused for a moment, and then understanding seems to dawn on his features; I feel his trepidation through the bond as we stare at each other. It is as though I’ve spoken the words out loud. I’m dimly aware of the others talking in hushed tones as Rowan takes a step back.

“I’m going to go talk to Grayson and Cade,” he says quietly. “I’m sure Kaiden and Jet will be briefing them.”

I want to stop him, to ask him about what Rian said, but there are too many people in the room, and I know my questions would probably make me sound insane. Vampires don’t exist. Did they ever exist? Was I just hallucinating?

Deep down, I know I wasn’t. I’ve always known, haven’t I?

He stops at the door and looks at me. I hear Senna talking about needing to eat and unpacking some food she’s brought, but I can’t tear my eyes away from his. All the answers to my questions are reflected in his gaze.

I see him turn to go, but something catches his eye, and he rushes forward to the monitor, spinning it around toward me. The flat lines have been replaced with a steady rhythm of peaks. “G-get Sara,” I say, not daring to consider what this means.

“What’s going on?” Kenzie asks, stepping forward to stop me from falling out of bed as I twist to see the screen better. Senna gasps and then runs from the room to find Sara.

Sara appears, and Kenzie moves to the side, turning to the other lunas. "Let’s step outside and find the men, give them some space.” She squeezes my hand. “We’re here for you.”

The moment the door closes, Sara grabs the monitor and stares at it, shock written all over her face. She turns to me and adjusts the pads that were still on my stomach. Silence falls in the room as the monitor readjusts. A second later, she turns ashen-white, her eyes widening. “I…I don’t understand.” She glances from the monitor to my stomach and back again.

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