Page 60 of All I've Waited For

Dad rapped his cane against the tile floor.

Derek froze, his gaze rounding on his father.

Shaking the folder, Dad’s eyes narrowed. “Son, why didn’t you run any of this by me before now?”

“You’ve had a lot going on.” Much as he’d been chasing down his to-do list around the vineyard, house, and town, Derek couldn’t have missed the very real toll dialysis had taken on his father. After a treatment, Dad slept for practically a full day—when he wasn’t tied to the toilet, that was. “I didn’t want to burden you.”

“Burden me? This ismybusiness.”

“Yes, but …” He wanted to shake the stubbornness right out of his father. Biting back a groan, he beelined for the other side of the kitchen island where a pile of dirty dishes sat in the sink. Since he’d needed the kitchen after dinner and Millie had left early for a doctor’s appointment, Derek had volunteered to clean up the mess Heather and Mia had left after making tacos for the whole family. No time like the present.

“But what?”

Dad wasn’t going to like his answer. Derek flicked on the hot water, maneuvered around the dirty dishes to plug the sink, and squirted in some soap. “You’re not the only one who wants to save it.”

“Of course not.” His dad eased onto the barstool at the island. “But ultimately, it’s my responsibility.”

“It’s never just beenyourresponsibility.” Picking up the scrub brush, he attacked the first plate. “You’re not the only one willing to do whatever it takes to save our home.”

The kitchen grew silent except for splashing water and grinding bristles against the ceramic plates. Then, “What are we talking about here, son?”

But Derek couldn’t tell him. It would break the man’s pride. “Nothing.” He dunked the plate into the soapy water, a bit of crusted-on refried beans clinging stubbornly to the stoneware.

“You weren’t in love with Claire, were you?”

The plate slipped from Derek’s hand and shattered on the floor.

Great. Just great.

Derek glanced up at Dad, prepared to see condemnation in his eyes—or disappointment, at the very least. But instead, something like sadness rested there.

Sighing, he glanced down at the mess he’d created. “No, I wasn’t. I respected her and she respected me, but …” He shrugged.

“I never asked that of you, son.”

“You didn’t have to. Like I said. Whatever it takes.” Squatting, he opened the cabinet under the sink and pulled out the hand broom and dustpan. Then he turned and swept up the largest pieces of the plate he’d broken.

“I should never have let you do so much after your mother left.”

Derek peeked up.

Dad’s head was in his hands. “I thought it would help you, to give you a purpose, but I didn’t realize I’d actually given the impression that everything was on your shoulders.”

“What do you mean?” Frowning, Derek returned to the cleanup. He’d need to grab a vacuum, but that could wait. This conversation was too important to be interrupted. “You knew I was doing all of that?”

“Of course I knew. You were only ten years old. I would never have put that weight on you.” His dad’s voice rang with conviction. Then he barked out a staccato laugh. “I paid Jorge extra to give you some things to do, watch out for you, and redo anything you didn’t get right.”

“I had no idea.” Derek scooped the last visible bits of the broken plate into the dustpan and tossed them into the trash. “You were so torn up about Mom. I thought I was helping you.”

The bitterness of the truth settled in his mouth. Much as he’d tried to help, he’d really only been a nuisance to poor Jorge. The man was a saint to have put up with him back then.

He reached for the pan Heather had used to cook the taco meat, and the scent of the leftover spicy seasonings inflamed his nose.

“Yes, I was torn up about your mother, but never so much that I forgot about you.” A pause. “And you helped more than you know. You and your sisters saved me from my grief. You were my gift in the darkness.”

The back of his eyes burned, and Derek scrubbed the pan in front of him harder. “I’m glad to have that all cleared up, but what about the here and now? What do we do about the vineyard?”

Dad sighed. “I’ve been going over it every which way, and I’ve approached some other vineyards for partnerships, but so far nothing has worked out.”

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