Page 10 of April Flowers

“Come on,” Noah said with a sigh. “Let me order pizza, at least.”

Avery looked like she wanted to protest. She wanted to shove his kindness in his face. But her hunger won out. “Okay.”

Noah got on the phone and ordered two big pizzas: a meat lovers, and one with sausage and green peppers, which was Mona’s favorite. Avery collapsed on the sofa with a can of Diet Mountain Dew and two slices of cheddar cheese. Noah could smell body odor and the mustiness of unused boathouses on her. Something else, too. Was it alcohol?

He needed a beer!

He’d never seen anyone gobble up a slice of cheese so quickly. It was impressive, really. In a flash, Avery was back on her feet to grab more. Noah said nothing.

It was strange to have Avery in his house. He couldn’t remember the last time he’d had anyone over—not even for a beer or to watch a game. His male friends, the ones who might have gone for that, were all in the chaos of raising children and needed at home, telling him, “Maybe in a few years I’ll find the time.”

He knew they thought he was a fool for not having children. Sometimes Noah thought he was a fool, too. Who would deny himself so much joy? Other times, he thought he was brilliant for stepping away from such a “pivotal part of life.” Noah saw how difficult it was for so many children. He saw the terrors of life: kids in juvenile detention, kids with parents who didn’t love them, and kids who were hungry or who’d had to take jobs at the age of thirteen, lying on their applications to make ends meet at home.

Noah knew the darkness of life. So maybe it was better that he hadn’t brought anyone new into the world.

That was what he told himself on his loneliest nights.

The pizza arrived. Noah pulled a card table out of the back closet and set it up in front of the sofa so they could eat and watch television. He let Avery choose what to put on, and she opted for the reality TV showLove Is Blind, where people tried to make romantic connections on the phone without ever seeing each other first. Noah found it ridiculous. But within just a few minutes, he was captivated. Was this how young people talked to each other? Was this how people fell in love? He’d been out of the game a long time. And then another question occurred to him. When had Noah become an “older person”? Up until recently, he’d thought of himself as rather young. He’d thought of himself as a man who still had time left. But now that he was nearing forty, he realized that wasn’t so.

Avery was sixteen. But she seemed so world-weary. She was still so hungry, too. She gobbled up an entire pizza and drank another can of Diet Mountain Dew. After that, Noah found a package of cookies in the cabinet, and she ate five of them.

Noah was glad. Although it was all trash food with very little nutrition, he felt good that he was filling her up. Maybe she would sleep through the night.

How often had she slept since she ran away? How much sleep had she gotten in that musty boathouse?

He wondered if Avery would ever tell him where she’d been the past few days. How had she gotten to Nantucket in the first place? What had made her run away from the wake?

But he was too exhausted to beg her for details.

Wordlessly, Noah and Avery watched two hours ofLove Is Blind. Avery eventually fell asleep on the sofa, and Noah didn’t know whether to wake her up or let her sleep in her clothes. He tried to think of what Mona would do in this situation but couldn’t find Mona’s voice in his head.

Why, Mona?he begged the universe.Why did you leave me like this?

He suddenly felt the black abyss of the future creeping closer and closer. He was trapped.

Chapter Four

Despite Margot’s best-laid plans for a day off—the first day off she’d set aside for herself since last September—she was up and at the door of the flower shop by six thirty the following morning, pinching her coffee cup between her chest and forearm as she turned the keys in the lock. The world had changed. As she stepped into the warm embrace of her little shop, she heard the frantic footsteps of Gabby coming up behind her. “Margot! What are you doing here?” There was a smile in her voice but also a great deal of fatigue. Margot guessed Matt and Gabby had stayed up a little (or a lot) too late, drinking wine, dancing in the kitchen, and making whispered promises about the future. Margot, who hadn’t slept a wink, couldn’t turn to look at her. She knew she looked like a wreck.

“I won’t be here long,” she explained to Gabby.

She could feel Gabby’s eyes on her as she turned on all the lights and pulled open the back door to let a draft of chilly fresh air in. The flower delivery was set to arrive around seven or seven thirty, depending on Boston traffic. Because it was February 15th and the day after Valentine’s Day, they had very few orders—mostly birthdays and anniversaries. Maybe they’d have a few odd stragglers dipping in for quick birthday presentsor dinner flowers. It brightened Margot’s spirits to remember that people still considered the minute details of their ordinary lives. They still wanted to beautify their dinner tables. They still wanted to remind those they loved they loved them with the special gift of a bouquet—even on such a boring and nothing day as February 15th.

“Other people’s normal lives” felt so far away from her own.

Gabby removed her gloves slowly and furrowed her brow at Margot. Margot ignored her and turned on the music, reaching for a broom to sweep the already swept floor.

“Are you going to tell me why you’re here?” Gabby asked finally.

Margot flinched, searching her mind for excuses.

“Come on, Margot.” Gabby sighed, rapping her knuckles on the glass counter. “You were so excited about your first day off in months. You told me you weren’t going to leave your bed till three p.m. You told me you were going to order sushi delivery.”

Margot felt as though somebody else had been excited about all that.

“Did something happen with Pete?” Gabby asked.

Margot let out an uncomfortable laugh.

---