Page 19 of Conspiracies and Chemistry

She’d dismissed me like I was irrelevant and not the founder of the company where she worked. I glared at her.

I wasn’t irrelevant. I’d ensure we’d finish the cancer test on time like I’d promised.

But as I pivoted on my loafer and blazed out of her office, I wondered if my new resolution to finish on time hadn’t been her intention all along.

10

Fashion Isn’t Your Friend

From Barry Wright’s manifesto:

As an aside, the handbag industry has pressured women’s clothing manufacturers to leave off pockets. I think the government might be in on it too. It takes a lot longer for a woman to grab a handgun out of a purse than out of a pocket.

TESSA

“Who the hell needs a pair of red leopard-print four-inch heels?” I plucked the offensive shoes from the pile I’d been sorting at Success in a Dress. It was Carly’s favorite charity, and she’d somehow coerced us all into volunteering here one Saturday a month. And this week, I’d invited my friends Justine and Bridget to join us.

After the week I’d had, I needed extra support. Not only had Oliver been a dick about the endometriosis test, while my belly was on fire from the pain, no less, but I’d had a run-in with a former employee while I was grabbing dinner the other night. I’d gotten complacent and forgotten to use my usual pseudonym, Velma, for my takeout. The second I said my name to the bartender, the woman glared at me and called me a name that shocked even me and got herself kicked out of the restaurant.

I’d paid her tab because I’d deserved it.

I didn’t deserve friends like these, but I was grateful for them.

Justine worked alongside Savannah, sorting through piles of donated professional clothing. Justine was an ace family lawyer, and I hoped they’d hit it off and she’d agree to represent Savannah in her divorce.

“Ooh, let me see those.” Carly waggled her fingers at me. I picked them up by their stiletto heels and held them out to her. “They look like they’ve been worn only a couple of times?—”

“Shocking,” I muttered, already digging in the mound of shoes for a match to the more modest periwinkle suede slingback in my hand.

“—so they’ve got plenty of wear left,” she finished. “You sure you don’t need these?” She dangled the shoes. “Now that you’re working in an office…”

“A lab,” I corrected her. “And there are rules. The first one being that closed-toe shoes are required.”

Carly stuck out her lower lip. “Where’s the fun in that?”

“I guess the fun part is that you don’t drop a rack of test tubes and cut your feet,” I said grudgingly.

“Ooh, do you get to wear a white coat?” Bridget asked. “I find those oddly sexy.”

“Then you’d better stay out of the lab. We all have to wear them.”

Carly wrinkled her nose. “Unless you get one custom-made, they’re shapeless and baggy.”

Was Oliver’s coat tailored? Was that why I couldn’t keep my eyes off the stretch of that ridiculous coat over his broad shoulders? I tightened my grip on the blue shoe in my hand. Blue like his eyes.

I dropped it on the table. I needed an industrial-strength cleanser to get Oliver Bond out of my brain. “What are you going to do with those shoes, Carly?” Nothing about the red leopard-prints reminded me of him. “Burn them?”

“Hell no! Bridget, do you have a red dress or suit over there?”

Bridget scanned the rack in front of her. “A skirt suit in size 14 and a sheath dress in size 2. Does anyone actually wear a 2?”

“The average American woman wears a size 16,” Carly said, “but most models are size 0 or 2. Go figure.” She held out her hand. “Give me that dress. It’s less likely our clientele will want it, so I’ll put it in our holiday display with the shoes. Lucie, do you have a chunky gold necklace?”

Lucie was at a desk sorting through trays of costume jewelry. “I’ve got ugly and butt-ugly.” She held up one with thick gold chain links and another with a beetle pendant at the center. “I can’t believe someone donated these. Scratch that. I can’t believe someone bought them in the first place. Must’ve been shopping under the influence.”

“Don’t you remember?” Carly said. “Things like that were fashionable in the ’90s. The chain one, please. It echoes the shape of the leopard spots, and I think beetles and leopards together might be too many animals.”

“Ooh,” Savannah said. I looked up from the shoes.

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