Page 50 of Lustful Nights

“At the coffee shop?”

I snicker, shaking my head. “Uh, no. At the strip club I work at.”

“The what?” he roars, standing up. “You work at a strip club? And Jensen went there?”

“Nope. You said you would not judge, so shut up and listen to me.”

He sits back down, shaking out his hands. “Fine.”

“Anyway, as I was saying, I work at a strip club; it’s good money, and it helps a lot with school. I don’t have to work many days a week, so it gives me time to study, but that’s not the point. So, I work at the club and Jensen came in for his boss’ party or something. He saw me on the stage, and at first, it was protectiveness. For you. He came back to make sure I was okay and safe. And I am, by the way. Okay and safe. And nothing happened until your birthday. And it was only a kiss then. But the next day I went to his place, and we talked. We both decided it would be better to see how things went instead of running to you immediately. And I mean, can you blame me? Any man I date you have only negative things to say about them.”

“Have you met the men you’ve dated?”

“That’s beside the point. I wanted to be sure before we told you what was going on. I stand by that. If we had informed you right away and then nothing happened, it would have put you in a weird spot.”

“You think I’m not in a weird spot now?” he asks, looking around Jensen’s living room. I know he can see the unique touches that I’ve added to the place. The throw pillows from my apartment that I’ve brought over and my set of textbooks for my classes are sitting on the end table. There are hints of me everywhere, showing how much I’m in Jensen’s life now.

“Will you ever be okay with this?” My heart hammers in my chest as I ask. I really hope he tells me what I want to hear. I need to have both Jensen and Nick in my life.

“It’s hard, not because I don’t want either of you to be happy. But because I wish neither of you had lied to me. But if you’re both happy, then that’s all I could ever want. And if that means you guys are happy with one another, then I’ll get over it. I refuse to stand in the way of your happiness, and hell, I know Jensen is probably the best man out there. And maybe the only one who’ll be able to put up with all your sassiness.”

“Do you mean that? You won’t ask me to choose?”

“I would never ask you to pick. And I’m sorry it took me so long to get to this point. I needed time to think. The flipping out was more because I felt betrayed, not because of who you’re with.”

“So, if we would have come to you right away, you would have been okay with it?”

“I’m okay with it now, Lennox. My feelings were just hurt. Jensen came and talked to me?—”

“He did?” I cut him off, smiling at the thought of Jensen doing that. He’s asked me a few times if I’ve heard from Nick and each time I said no, I would get sadder, and I know he couldsee it. How much not talking to Nick was hurting me, as well as himself.

“Yeah, and to be honest, I’m glad he did. You know me, my ego won’t allow me to admit when I’m wrong. Which I never am, but still.” Nick smiles at me and the warmth radiating off him lets me know everything is going to be okay. “But there is something I need to know more about.”

“No, you don’t.” I shake my head, knowing exactly where he’s going with this. His overprotective streak will never end and telling him about Peaches opened a can of worms I know I can never close again.

“Lennox, are you sure you’re okay? Dancing at a strip club?”

“I enjoy it.” I shrug my shoulders, hoping he’ll understand. “When I went back to school for nursing, it was the same time I decided I needed to do things that make me happy. Dancing is one of them. Did I imagine myself performing half-naked for men and women? No, but I don’t regret it either. I have a blast when I’m up there and it’s exciting doing something that’s new and different for me. I’m never asking you to come watch me, ‘cause ew. But I am begging you to trust that I know what I’m doing.”

“Sometimes I forget you’re not my scrawny little brother who needed my help when we were growing up.”

“I’ll always need you, Nick. Just not as much as you think I do.” I scoot closer to him, resting my head on his shoulder. “We’re going to be okay, right?”

“Yeah, we’re gonna be perfect.”

Nick stays around for a brief time longer before he leaves for the night. He doesn’t wait for Jensen to come home because, to be honest, Jensen could be out riding his bike for a few hours. I study for a while until my eyes gloss over before texting Jensen.

Lennox:Are you almost home?

My phone sits quietly until it finally vibrates against the table.

Jensen:Sorry, I got distracted with drawing. I’m on my way now. Order dinner?

Lennox:Italian or Mexican?

Jensen:Surprise me

I place an order at the local Italian restaurant, and while waiting, I decide to take a shower. After Jensen gave his body to me a few nights ago, I’ve wanted nothing more than to give mine back to him. But something was hindering me. After talking to Nick, I realized it was him who was holding me back. I didn’t want to fully move forward with Jensen until I knew Nick would be okay with it. And now that he is, I’m all in. I’ve never wanted someone as badly as I want Jensen, and I hope he’ll have me tonight.

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