Page 245 of The Sins of Silas

“Very well,” I conceded.

After a brief pause in the dark light, she asked quietly, “Do you feel things have changed between us?”

The question spiked my heart rate. “What makes you ask?”

“You've hardly touched me since beginning this journey… have barely even kissed me since before we left Faltrun.”

Guilt spread through my chest as I stared at her. I needed to be honest and come clean with the truth of my past and who I was, but the words wouldn't come out.

“I'm just stressed,” I deflected.

Her face twisted, and she lifted her hands to rub her temples.

“Is your head alright?” I asked softly.

“I've been getting these headaches…I don't know. Must be fromstress.”

Her sarcasm wasn't lost on me. She didn't believe my excuse.

“Perhaps we can find you a remedy in the morning for it.”

She didn't reply.

“Let me rub your back. Perhaps it'll help,” I offered.

She looked at me then, eyes wide. Miserable.

I gave her atight-lipped smile, and I didn't miss the slight tremble of her lips as she turned to her side, allowing me to lift the fabric of her shirt to caress her skin.

My fingers glided over her tanned flesh, and I began to hear her cry.

“Era,” I whispered in concern. “What's wrong?”

“Nothing,” she cried softly.

I pulled her back against my chest, holding her to me. I was a hypocrite for saying, “Talk to me.”

“It's just my head,” she mumbled.

I thought over all the possibilities. Did guilt weigh on her, too? Or was my distance causing this much pain?

We'd never been overwhelmingly close, but I would make love to her frequently. I supposed it was clear that something had changed.

“Is Merrick's head hurting, too?”

Her whole body tensed, giving me an answer. “What?” she whispered.

“You two were trapped together. I was just wondering if these headaches were affecting him, too,” I murmured, still gliding my hand across her back.

“I…I don't know.”

I wanted to ask if she had feelings for him…wanted to tell her it was okay if she did. But on the off chance she didn’t, I wasn’t ready to speak of my own sentiments.

“Whatever weighs on you, Erabella,” I mumbled into her ear, “don't allow it to. I know this journey hasn’t been easy, but we’ve gathered many allies. I think it will be sooner rather than later we can go home.”

She let out a faint cry, and I hushed her, relaxing her with my touch.

Even if she wouldn’t be my queen, Otacia would always be a home to her. And I'd ensure she was set for the rest of her life, living lavishly and freely, the way she deserved to be.