I grasped his hands. His physical strength far superseded my own, but I pulled hard, forcing his assault to a halt. His black eyes shot open, taking me in.
“I know…” I slowly removed one of my hands from his. I gently stroked his cheek, and those haunting eyes fluttered shut. “It will be over before you know it,” I promised.
His breaths were shallow. “You left me,” he whispered.
My stomach dropped, guilt overtaking me. “I know…I am so sorry…”
“I…if it happens again…” His voice trailed off. “If he finds out…if he sees…” His black eyes shot open, blown wide. “I CAN’T, LENA! I CAN’T!”
His back shot up from the ground, and he crawled back on his palms, stumbling away as if I were something sinister.
“Silas!” I cried, crawling to him and then holding his face in my hands. His frightened eyes locked on mine, his body tremblingin trepidation. “What you are seeing is not real. You are safe!” Tears slid down my cheeks. “You are safe with me, Quill.”
His lip trembled, his chest rising and falling rapidly. “Safe…” he breathed.
“Yes, safe with me, Quill,” I repeated, pressing my lips to his forehead, my eyes squeezing shut as more tears poured out of me. It was wrecking me seeing him like this.
“I don’t accept it…I don’t.” He shook his head back and forth, his eyes shutting.
I knew I couldn’t reason with him. He was sputtering nonsense.
The necromancer said hallucinations. What exactly was Silas seeing?
His whole forehead was covered in sweat.
“Silas, let’s take your shirt off.”
His eyes flared. “No,” he growled.
“You are covered in sweat.” My fingers only brushed the buttons of his shirt before he roughly gripped my wrist.
“NO!” he shouted.
I flinched. He’d never yelled at me like that before. My voice was small as I asked, “May I unbutton it at least?”
His breathing was staggered, his eyes flashing with so many emotions. “My back.” His voice broke. “My back must stay covered.”
My eyes softened. “Okay. I promise your back will stay covered.”
Slowly, I released each button, revealing skin just as golden beneath it. His body was even more defined than when we were younger, and sweat droplets were trickling down his chest and stomach muscles, the skin covered in ink just like the rest of him.Part of me missed his bare skin from before, but I found myself loving his flesh for what it was now.
I think I would love any version of him. I don’t think I could help it.
When I separated the fabric, my lips parted as I took in the view of the tattoo in the center of his chest.
A dagger. Not just any dagger. It was the exact same hilt as the one I used when we were younger…when he trained me. The first weapon I ever bought myself. The one I held to a girl's neck the first day Silas saw me.
The blade was piercing through a—
“Flower,” Silas breathed.
My teary eyes slid up to meet his. “This tattoo…” I traced my fingers along the ink, and Silas shivered at my touch, his body relaxing. “You got it for me?”
“It’s…It’s your dagger, going through a rose. Your favorite…flower,” His breathing quickened. “Over my heart.” His face crumpled as he took me in. “I wish I could have saved you,” he choked. “I should have kept you safe.”
“Silas…” I brought my lips to his forehead again, the taste of his sweat salty against my lips. “I am alive. I am here with you.”
“Alive…” he breathed, and as I pulled away, he gripped the back of my neck.