Page 1 of The Sins of Silas

Chapter One

SILAS - FIVE YEARS AGO

Iawoke to swollen eyes, just as I had the past few nights, and cursed myself when I peered at the clock resting on my nightstand.

6:50 a.m. The council meeting begins in just ten minutes.

Flinging off the comforter cocooning me, I hurried to the bathroom sink, soaking a rag with cold water and wringing it out. I held it to my eyes in an attempt to lessen the puffiness.

It was no surprise I looked this way; I had cried myself to sleep the past couple of nights…ever since my mother was murdered. Last night, I had woken from my sleep in a cold sweat, chest heaving, heart pounding.

Something had felt off. Strange. I didn't know what, but the uneasy sensation made it difficult to fallback asleep.

I pressed the rag to my other swollen eye. The King would not be pleased to witness such weakness. I could only hope he wouldn’t be able to tell I had been crying.

I often wondered if the man had a soul. I hadn’t seen him shed a single tear since Mother’s passing. Though that wasn’t entirely alarming…I had never seen my father cry my entire life.

My thoughts drifted to Lena, how it felt holding her last night. Her body against mine, how it felt to kiss her.

I wanted her to be at my side in this castle. I wanted to sleep beside her every night, holding her close. But I hated the thought of her risking her life to see me. It was still unclear if the danger had entirely been eliminated, and I found myself wishing for her to stay away for a while—just until we knew it was secure again. I couldn’t stand the thought of anything happening to her.

I scrubbed at my face in frustration. How was I going to ensure our future together? Mother had completely supported our relationship, but now she was gone. The King would never accept Lena as Otacia’s princess and future queen.

I placed the cloth down, my eyes looking only slightly less swollen, and was startled by a knock on the door.

“The meeting has begun, Your Highness,” Daerin, one of our guards, informed through the door. “The King is not pleased.”

“I’ll be out momentarily,” I called out.

Strange. Usually, it was Torrin who would fetch me.

I chucked off my lounge pants as I heard the steps retreating from my door, then dressed in my fine clothes: a tunic adorned with silver embroidery, trousers that fit tightly against the muscles in my legs, and boots. All were black—the color I wore most days.

Lastly, I placed my silver crown atop my head and studied myself in the mirror beside my bed. The sapphires set in it sparkled from the morning sun filtering into my room.

My hair isn’t neat enough, and my damn eyes…

I raked my hands down my face.

I didn’t recognize myself most days anymore. Aside from these swollen eyes, wearing these clothes…this crown…it all felt heavy. Too heavy.

I wished I could be an ordinary man…wished I didn’t have these responsibilities. All I desired was to be with Lena, tolive, not just go through the motions as I had every day before meeting the fiery, red-headed beauty.

The corner of my mouth went up at the thought of her. It would be her birthday in just five days. Though I had recently given her my mother’s necklace, I still wished to surprise her with something else. I’d pondered various ideas last night, but nothing had stuck out. I’d gifted her several gowns already, and I had just given her jewelry, so earrings seemed uninspired.

Perhaps I could purchase a new weapon for her, or I could write her a poem…though I am not very talented in that regard.

I’d actually written her a handful of poems and letters since I met her, but I still hadn’t found the courage to give them to her. I had no problem professing my love in person…but I found myself feeling nervous at the thought of her reading such vulnerable words. I kept them tucked safely under my mattress. I'd give them to her eventually.

So, what else could I gift her?

Lena would always protest whenever I spoiled her, but regardless, her pleas would not sway me. She deserved more than what life had given her thus far.

If only I could turn back the clock and enjoy just one more day outside these castle walls, I would take her to a nice restaurant or even spend another afternoon in the forest lying together, watching the clouds pass through the tree branches. I just wanted one more day of going unnoticed, one more day of experiencing what others perceived as ordinary moments. They were anything but ordinary to me.

I sighed as I exited my quarters, navigating the various white hallways. Had it always been so prosaic and dull in this place? Had it always lacked color and vibrancy?

I was approaching the war room when I saw Finnan with his ear pressed to the black, wooden door.

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