Page 92 of Science Project

“Nicole,” Akio scolded. Well, it wasn’t so much of a scold, more like a tone change in his voice. But coming from him, it felt like a scold because he rarely raised his voice. “Who made you feel that way?”

“All the guys who’ve touched me,” I whispered. “If I were ugly, then they wouldn’t have.”

“People who do stuff like that don’t care what a woman looks like,” he said, drawing me closer. “Don’t feel ashamed over any of this because you didn’t cause it. Now, please, tell me who hurt you. Just another name.”

“If I tell you, you won’t believe me. Nobody does.”

“Yes, I will.”

I curled my fingers against his chest. “No, Akio, you won’t.”

Even if there were a chance that he would believe me, I couldn’t take it. I was just pushing, stalling, waiting for him to give up. Nobody gave a fuck about me, and Akio wouldn’t one day either.

“Nicole,” he said, his voice softer this time.

“Stop, Akio!” I cried, tears streaming down my face. “Please, stop.”

“I just want to protect you,” he whispered.

“If you knew everything that I’d done and with whom, you’d think I was nothing more than a dirty slut.” I shook my head and wiped my tears with the back of my hand. “I’m disgusting and gross and not someone that you should want to protect.”

Akio sat up, fury painted across his face. “You don’t get to tell me who I should and shouldn’t want to protect, Nicole. You don’t get to tell me how I feel about you. I don’t care how many times I have to tell you, but I love you for you. Not for what others have put you through.”

My lips quivered, and I shuffled up the bed, grasping the blankets in my hands and pulling them to my chest in an attempt to shield myself from him, to protect myself. I wanted a relationship so badly, and yet I couldn’t stop pushing him away.

“Do you understand me, Nicole?” Akio asked, his eyes softening. “I love you.”

I stared at him for a few long moments, feeling so many emotions inside me and yet none at the same time. I thought I loved him, but I didn’t even know what love felt like. I had only gotten a taste with Hannah, but that had been so long ago.

Akio grasped my face and moved closer. “I love you.”

Chin trembling, I bit down on my lower lip to suppress a whimper. “If you love me, then let me tell you what has happened to me whenever I’m ready because I’m not ready now, Akio. I’m scared and nervous, and I don’t want to think about all the bad things when I’m with you.”

After relaxing his features, Akio swallowed and nodded. “Okay.”

My eyes widened slightly because I’d expected to fight with him, just like Dad fought with me on everything. I hadn’t expected him to give in, to show me respect—though I should’ve expected that from Akio.

“Really?” I whispered.

“Tell me when you’re ready, but please,” he pleaded, taking my hands in his and pulling them between us, “don’t let that be long. Whoever is hurting you, I don’t want them to get another chance at it.”

CHAPTER

FIFTY-THREE

AKIO

“Was that girl in my house?” Mom growled a few days after Nicole had slept over.

I grabbed my keys from the front room and opened the door. “No.”

“Akio! Don’t you leave this fucking house. You have some explaining?—”

Before she could finish her sentence, I slipped out the front door and ran to my car. I didn’t want to deal with her trying to convince me to do her dirty work again. She had barely said a word to me all weekend, and now this?

Once I locked all my doors and started the car, I pulled out my phone to text Kai.

The one person who hated me the most in Redwood.

---