Page 35 of To Have and to Hold

I nodded and fought with my heavy eyelids as Gabe carried me into my room and deposited me on the bed. Without a word, he rummaged through my wardrobe, pulling out a black dress that he chucked beside me as I tried to take stock of my body.

“Look. Your family are returning to the US. You need to be… presentable enough. There’ll be photos. Maybe in the press. Lucy will be in soon to tend to you.” Gabe spoke with a flat inflection, but his eyes were warm, like he was trying to convey something. I was too damn tired to figure out what.

“Why are they coming back?” I asked, knowing he wouldn’t tell me.

Fast, he stepped into my space, grazed my cheek with a tenderness I wasn’t used to. No man in this house touched me with anything other than violence. “Just do your best. Play your part. I think… I think things will be getting better soon.”

And with that, he left me. Confused. Battered. And I didn’t move until Lucy came in, what felt like hours later. I think it was seconds, but my brain was slow, my limbs under thick molasses when I attempted movement. I couldn’t catch up with Gabe’s words.

Family.

They were coming.

Theo was coming.

“TellmeaboutTheodore,”Rafe said, and my heart bottomed out.

I was in his office, of all places, sitting in my black dress with my hands in my lap and fear tingling at my throat.

The office looked nothing like it belonged to the head of a church, it was modern, with sleek black furniture and harsh lines. Rafael looked like he belonged, his dark hair and eyes, the sharpness of his jaw and his words fitting. I shifted, so uncomfortable and scared it was hard to talk. Why did he want to know about Theo? Why now?

“Uh—” I said, the urge to ask, to protect him, throwing me off. Gabe and Jack stood behind Rafe, watching me closely. Gabe’s eyes were softer, but that was all. There was no one in this room for me. “He’s… he’s a good person.”

Rafe snorted. “I don’t want to know that. Is he loyal? Like his disgusting brother?”

My brows furrowed, my brain stuttered again. I didn’t know what he wanted from me, what he wanted to hear. Images of the repulsive Charlie flashed through my head. Rafe thought it too, but he’d coerced him into it. Made my brother… I blinked, trying to defog my brain to avoid Rafe’s wrath. It was coming. It was always just under the surface of his skin, his words. “He’s… he’s loyal,” I replied, letting Theo’s handsome face push away all thoughts of Charlie. “He, uh, he’s in Chicago. Working there.” But he'd appeared, out of thin air, stuck a needle in me anddisappeared again in a puff of air. Christ, maybe I'd hallucinated that.

Rafe laughed. “God, you really do know nothing, you pathetic bitch.”

I looked up and met his eyes, still confused. He and Jack chuckled some more, and a beat later, Gabe joined in. All of them, staring at me and laughing, looming over me. I felt so small.

“I’m sorry…” I trailed off.

“Theo was never in Chicago, little girl,” Rafe told me. “He lived with Charlie about two minutes down the road this entire time. Not a day since our wedding day has he been out of the state. And now heisCharlie.”

“What do you mean?” I whispered, hurt and confusion making my gut squeeze. Theo was here? He IS here? My mind jumped around. He’d visited, yes, but I wasn’t unconvinced it hadn’t been some sort of fever dream, the desperate mirage of a sick and lonely woman. Theo didn’t leave his mark like Rafe did, so I had no proof on my skin.

“Charlie is dead.” Rafe’s voice was bitter, goading, his eyes flashing with evil glee. He wanted me to react, to show him my sadness. But all I could think about was that betrayal I’d felt, the look on my oldest brother’s face when he orgasmed over my brutalized body, laughed with my tormentors and became one himself. He was empty inside, like the rest of them. If his outsides were dead now too, I experienced nothing but relief. “We don’t know who did it.”

I nodded, ducking my head so they wouldn’t notice the glimmer of hope in my eye. I had to hide that, squash it the hell away, or Rafe would make it his mission to take it from me.

“Your other brother, Theodore. He’s coming here to discuss the transition of power. He’s our liaison now.”

I looked up in surprise. Did that mean—? Would I see him more? I bit my cheek to suppress the hope again. Needing it to be just for me.

“I need you to act the good little wife. There will be a lot of eyes on us over the next few weeks.” Rafe muttered something under his breath, words that sounded a little like ‘fucking cops sniffing around’. If I saw one, anyone in uniform, I would scream until my throat shredded. But I nodded.

“Of course,” I mumbled, my eyes catching with Gabe’s for a second, not missing the look of relief flashing across his features.

“He will be at the party tonight, along with your uncle, then in a few days, Charlie’s funeral,” Rafe told me. “The rest of yourwonderful familyis on their way.”

My heart was racing at the thought, mind whirling around with all the possibilities. I was going to see Theo again. Even if from across the room, I was excited for it. For something. A glimmer of hope, a flicker.

“You will be on your best behavior, yes?” Rafe warned. I didn’t react fast enough, my mind stuck on Theo being here. “Come here, on your knees,” Rafe demanded, and I took a moment to even realize that the request was for me.

“What?” I blurted, before realizing my mistake and wincing. Bracing.

Rafe looked monstrous, an evil joy glittering behind his eyes as he no doubt plotted how to torture me for my rudeness.

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