Page 11 of From Us, Forever

“This means you worked through your insecurities—with the support of your boyfriend—and you were brave enough to do something you wouldn’t have imagined doing. The way I see it, that’s a win. It’s okay to ask for help, Evelyn. You don’t have to validate these feelings and overanalyze them. It’s human to feel both the negatives and positives.”

I sighed. “I understand.”

Well over an hour later, I left the session, my head clearer and my breath lighter. After all these years, I never realized that I needed therapy. Given all the baggage I carried, I should’ve done this earlier. I didn’t know how much I needed it till now.

Some people had to go through worse shit than me, but I wasn’t expecting the hurricane I got swirled up in at eighteen. From losing Jay to Auntie M to having no home or money to pay off a mountain of debt, I got swallowed up by the actual struggles of the world. It changed me.

I didn’t even realize I had built fences around me, prickly and sharp, despising the girl staring back at me in the mirror. I succumbed to the version of myself that was no longer me, no longer carefree and hopeful because the pain of my hopes getting crushed wasn’t something I wanted to relive.

But I was slowly shedding away from the version and stepping into a new one I was proud of.

“Good one?” Mikey’s lips tugged into a grin as he held the car door open for me, ever the gentleman.

“Yeah.” I smiled, thanking him.

I watched as he sauntered around the car and slid inside. “Your man is going to have my head if he finds out I’ve been driving you around town,” he joked, starting the engine.

“Therapy, Michael—not somewhere sinister.” I gave him a look. “And it’s not like I don’t want him to.” I secured my seat belt. “It’s something I’m doing for me. I know Jay will want to support me, which I appreciate, but I want him to be proud of me for doing this on my own.”

Mikey nodded. “You don’t ever have to explain to anyone to make yourself feel better, E. You owe that to yourself.”

“I think I know that now. Thanks for doing this, by the way.” My voice lay thick with emotion all of a sudden. “I didn’t know who else to ask.”

“Hey.” His tone softened, and a serious look swept over his face. “You can ask me for anything, E. It doesn’t matter ifyou’re with that fucker or not. I’m always going to be here for you.”

My heart warmed, and I couldn’t help the smile that swept across my lips. “I think it’s too late for that. It’s impossible for me to leave him, but don’t tell him that. I’m trying to be firm with my boundaries and all, when I very well know they are nonexistent when it comes tohim.”

He motioned his fingers across his lips. “My lips are sealed.”

I laughed, shaking my head as he drove me home.

A life withouthimwasn’t worth living. I knew that now.

“So gold with poppies or pink with violets?” Gabe’s questioning eyes implored me.

Hell, how was I supposed to know? He was asking me to make a decision when he very well knew I couldn’t choose. It didn’t matter if I went to therapy for years. One thing that wouldn’t change about me was my indecisiveness and clumsiness.

Katy took pity on my panicked eyes. “How about pink with violets if it’s a girl and gold with poppies if it’s a boy?”

That answer seemed to satisfy Gabe as he nodded. “You’re right.”

I huffed out a breath, suppressing the urge to roll my eyes. After the success ofthe launch event, Katy put in a good word for Gabe which made him land a few clients to continue building his profile. I was proud and happy that he finally got the break he deserved and was no longer the manager atBlueline. However, I would miss seeing him at the reception desk every day, flirting with unsuspecting wives.

“Okay, I’m done.” Lily shot off to her feet as she put aside her graph pad.

“Then let’s go, bitches,” Gabe shouted while I donned a jacket over my tiny dress.

We were all going out tonight, probably one last big night for a while since Katy was returning to LA. With Gabe’s schedule and Lily’s internship, it looked like we wouldn’t be planning something like this again for a while.

“Do you really have to go?” Jay’s sad eyes met mine from the couch where he was currently sulking.

“Yes,” I confirmed like I already had a few hundred times.

“Oh, come on. The sky won’t fall if Evy goes out with us for one night. We promise to bring her back before she turns into a pumpkin,” Lily scolded her brother.

“Fine, be safe. All of you.” He eyed us girls.

“J.J., don’t worry, I’ll punch any guys that dare to bother our girls,” Gabe added, closing his arms around Katy and Lily.