Page 33 of Thorn of Sorrow

Yet, as I’d watched Kyson heal and rise from the ashes, a desperate longing grew inside of me to be a part of his life.

And tonight, it all came crashing down. I glanced at the couple dancing with a painful ache in my chest, realizing I’d made the worst mistake I could’ve made. I’d opened myself up to him.

Kyson couldn’t get away from me fast enough after what I thought was a profound moment between us. In reality, it was nothing more than sex to him, and I was just another lover who had scratched his itch.

I didn’t need this complicated mess of emotions or the feeling of my heart being ripped from my chest. Love was bullshit, and I didn’t need it in my life.

Then why are you observing the humans? Why are you trying to find a way to be a better man for him, to step out of the darkness?

“Shut the fuck up,” I snarled at my conscience, something I didn’t used to have. I couldn’t even blame that phenomenon on Kyson. It had been Colson who’d unlocked that inside of me.

Just another reason to resent the cheating bastard.

I could observe them for a hundred damn years, but I still would be the monster my parents had created. I turned away from the celebration. No matter how much I wanted to change for Kyson, my hands would always be stained with blood.

Rather than using the shimmer to return home, I headed down the street. Why bother going back? He wouldn’t be waiting for me anyway.

Damn it. I had to stop fixating on Kyson.

It wasn’t healthy to obsess over someone constantly. I was starting to feel like a stalker.

What I needed was a willing body under me, someone who could help me rid myself of these pointless, soul-sucking emotions.

Just meaningless sex so I could forget how the human had accomplished what centuries of enemies had failed at.

Bringing me to my knees.

I had never needed anyone, and I didn’t need Kyson either.

For thousands of years I’d survived without love.

Shit, I sounded bitter as hell. What was Kyson doing to me?

My steps slowed when I noticed a couple in the park. Two males. One large, one small.

What made me pause was the fact the small male was clearly uncomfortable, recoiling when the other one tried to reach for him.

Instinctively, my hands reached for my daggers as I headed toward them, though I didn’t pull them free.

My monster stirred and grew excited, sensing my foul mood. It craved bloodshed, begged for it.

Tonight, it just might get what it wanted.

After waiting for a car to pass, I closed the distance, catching snippets of the conversation.

“I already told you. I’ve changed my mind. Please, just leave me alone.” His heart was pounding, his breathing shallow.

My fangs ached with the instinct to feed, but that wasn’t why I was here.

I had a different objective. Teaching this son of a bitch the meaning of the word no.

Why does this even matter to you?

My subconscious would be the next thing I silenced if it didn’t stop annoying me.

Neither turned at my approach. Never alert the enemy to your presence had become second nature to me. A principle I had lived by for so long that it had become ingrained in me. But I wasn’t facing an enemy, just a creep preying on someone who needed help. I wasn’t on a battlefield preparing for war. My feet were firmly planted in Ashwood, yet my mind was transported back to a time under that dead tree, surrounded by carnage.

The memory was so vivid I could still feel the delicate bird in my hands, its soft feathers soothing under my touch. I had carried it with me everywhere until it had finally healed.

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