Page 83 of Impending Consent

"That's fear, Sail. You seem happier and more settled, even TJ agrees. This marriage is good for you," Indi said.

"TJ needs to mind his business," I mumbled.

"He worries about you. We all do, or rather did, until recently. Now we're just cautiously optimistic." Indi smiled smugly.

"Fair enough. I'd be suspicious too, if the roles were reversed. This isn't exactly on-brand for me."

"Maybe your brand needed an update," Skylar suggested, reaching for her wine bottle again. "The ‘love ’em and leave ’em’ approach was getting old anyway."

"Says the woman who swore off relationships entirely before Gray bulldozed his way into her life," I reminded her.

"Exactly and look at me now. Married with a beautiful daughter and baby two on the way, happi?—"

"If you say happier than I've ever been, I will throw this damn pillow at your pregnant ass.”

"I was going to say happier than your miserable ass used to be, but go off, sis." Skylar grinned.

Indi laughed, helping herself to more of the sushi we ordered. "But seriously, Sail, is this real or is it just a comfortable arrangement you're enjoying while it lasts?"

The question hit closer to home than I wanted to admit. "I don't know. Some days it feels very real and other days I remind myself how it started and wonder if we're just making the best of a bad situation."

"Has he said anything about the future? Like what happens when your year is up?"

I shook my head. "Not directly but he makes comments sometimes. Little things about next summer or plans for the house that would take more than a year to complete. Like he's assuming I'll still be there and he’s made it very clear that he wants me to be."

"And how does that make you feel?" Indi asked.

"Terrified," I admitted. "But also settled and like this is exactly what I needed."

Skylar and Indi exchanged a look that I couldn't quite interpret.

"What?" I demanded.

"Nothing," Skylar said smugly. "Just sounds like you might be falling for your husband."

Fell. I had already fallen…

"I didn't say that.”

"You didn't have to." Indi laughed. "It's all over your face when you talk about him and not in the ‘the dick is exceptional’ kind of way. More like the ‘I like being wifey’ type of way."

I buried my face in my hands. "This is so fucking embarrassing. I feel like a teenager with a crush."

"It's not embarrassing, Sail. It's human. You found someone who gets you, who challenges but also accepts you. That's rare. Even if it started unconventionally and crushing on your husband is good shit." Sky admitted with a grin, acknowledging how she was forever crushing on her husband.

"Unconventional isn’t a bad thing. Look at me and TJ. Nothing about our beginning was traditional. He couldn't even stand being touched when we met. Now we're married with a life I never imagined for myself. I love that man."

“And he loves you,” I confirmed. My brother worshipped his wife and I loved that she grounded him. TJ and Indi's path had been and still was, at times, complicated by his depression, yet they built something beautiful together. Sky and Gray had overcome his past scandals and her trust issues to create a solid marriage, but I wasn’t them...

"I'm scared," I admitted quietly. "What if I'm not cut out for this? What if I mess things up?"

"Everyone's scared when it really counts and everyone messes up sometimes. The question is whether what you're building is worth working through those mistakes and fighting for." Sky’s eyes locked with mine.

"Is it worth it to you, Sail?" Indi asked softly.

"Yeah.” I sighed, knowing it was definitely worth fighting for. "I think it might be."

"Then that's your answer. Now, can we please talk about something else before I start crying? These pregnancy hormoneshave me emotional over everything. I cried yesterday because Gray took out the trash. Like what the fuck?"

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