Page 77 of Cold Threat

“No, I don’t,” Ray said, “especially since your mother’s roast is the best I’ve ever tasted.”

River and Tony got up and left Ray behind to call the station. As River walked down the stairs toward the kitchen, she wondered if Ray was right. Had they done everything they could? And even more importantly, was it enough to stop the Snowman?

CHAPTER

FORTY-THREE

When River woke up the next morning, she got out of bed and hurried to the window. She pulled back the drapes and looked at the sky. Dark clouds were beginning to gather. For someone who loved snow, the sight was ominous and filled her with misgivings for the first time she could ever remember.

She went back and checked the clock on the nightstand. A little after seven thirty. She got back under the covers, turned on her back, and looked up at the ceiling. She’d slept pretty well last night. No nightmares. It seemed that when her mind was filled with other things, like finding the Snowman, the dreams about that night in the river were less frequent. Although that sounded like a positive thing, it really wasn’t. The nightmare was worse, but still, her mind was full of thoughts about death. River and Tony had both experienced the loss of friends in law enforcement who took their lives because they couldn’t deal with the reality of evil that lurked in the dark, waiting to pounce on the innocent. It was hard to deal with. Of course, if she hadn’t initially rejected God, she would have handled what happened with the Strangler better. PTSD certainly wasn’t from Him. It was fear, pure andsimple, and pretending it didn’t exist, like many in law enforcement tried to, wasn’t the answer. Sooner or later, the monsters in our minds come out to play.

“Lord,” she whispered, “I want to be free of the fear, but I want true healing from You. Real deliverance.”

She’d just prayed when she felt words well up inside of her.Be still and know that I am God.

She’d had this experience before—hearing the Holy Spirit speak to her—but every time it surprised her. Of course, it shouldn’t. Jesus had said that the Holy Spirit would guide us ... that He would lead us. So why did it still startle her? Her father’s church had never taught that God still spoke to people. It was something she was getting used to.

“Thank You,” she said quietly. To her, that scripture meant that she should stop trying to figure everything out. That she should just ... be. And trust that God had the situation well in hand. It made her feel lighter. Happier. She was still concerned about the Snowman, but she decided she was going to do everything she could to relax and believe God had heard their prayers. Slowly but surely, she was learning there really was Someone she could trust entirely. That God wasn’t like her parents ... or anyone else who’d ever let her down. She closed her eyes and worshipped Him for a few minutes. She thanked Him that the reign of the Snowman was coming to an end.

After getting dressed, River went downstairs. The aroma of bacon filled the air. She pulled on the waistband in her jeans. Was it any tighter? If she didn’t get out of Burlington before long, she’d have to buy a larger pair.

This morning she was surprised to find that she’d beaten Tony downstairs. Usually, everyone else was eating breakfast by the time she reached the kitchen. Beth was at the stove, and Ray was sitting in his chair. He smiled at her when she came into the room.

“Good morning,” she said when she saw him. “Have you heard anything from the hospitals yet?”

He shook his head. “By the time Duggan got someone on the phone, the people he needed to talk to had left for the day. He’s checking back this morning.”

River took a deep breath. They were still in the dark about how to locate Michael Wilson, and snow was on the way. She breathed out slowly, forcing her body to stay calm. She’d made the decision to be still and trust God, and she wasn’t going to allow fear back into her mind.

When working at the BAU, analysts felt the pressure of helping law enforcement find UNSUBs. It was hard not to feel responsible for the lives lost before killers were apprehended. There had been times when the atmosphere in the unit was so tense you could almost cut it with a knife. At the time, it seemed as if worrying about the apprehension of killers was the correct way to respond. But now it looked as if God’s way of doing things was the exact opposite of how people handled the same situations.

“River, did you hear me?”

River looked up to see Beth staring at her.

“I ... I’m sorry. I was thinking about something. What did you say?”

Beth smiled. “Believe me, no apology necessary. When Ray’s on a case, I end up repeating things over and over. His mind is usually somewhere else.” She patted River on the shoulder. “I just wondered how you want your eggs.”

“Oh, thanks,” River said, relieved she hadn’t offended Beth. “Over hard?”

“You got it. That’s how I like mine. Either over hard or scrambled. I hate runny eggs.”

“Well, I love them, Mom. Make mine runny.”

Tony came strolling into the room. He looked tired.

“Did you have a hard time sleeping?” River asked him.

“Yeah, I did.” He sighed. “I keep going over and over everything. Trying to come up with something that will help us find the Snowman before tonight. So far, I’m striking out.” He went to one of the cabinets, pulled out a cup, and poured himself some coffee. Then he smiled at River. “I know I said I was putting this in God’s hands, but I’m struggling for some reason. Sorry.”

“Don’t worry about it,” River said. “I understand. Still...”

“Yeah, I know. I’m working on it.” He turned toward his father. “Anything on the hospital angle, Dad?”

“Not yet. Waiting on Duggan. We should hear something before too long.”

“Great.” Tony sat down next to River. This morning, his gray sweater made his gray-blue eyes appear more gray than blue. He looked at her and smiled again. The gesture made her feel flushed. She looked away, not wanting him to realize how she was reacting to him. She forced her thoughts back to the case.

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