Page 44 of Cold Threat

“We’re doing puzzles. I’m having so much fun. Tonight, we’re going to watchWhite Christmas. Do you remember when we used to watch it together?”

Did Rose understand what she’d said? That they weren’t coming home right away? It was as if it hadn’t registered at all. It seemed as if sometimes Rose could only concentrate on what was happening to her in the moment. It was hard sometimes to know whether the disease was talking or if the thoughts were actually her mother’s.

River couldn’t remember ever watching Christmas movies with Rose. Her father hadn’t allowed them, and after he was gone, Rose ignored Christmas. River was the one who put up the tree, bought gifts for Dan from her and from her mother. One year, she even tried to cook Christmas dinner. That had been a disaster, so she’d ordered something from the Chinese restaurant not far from their house. It was the only restaurant open near them.After that, it became a tradition. One Christmas, River managed to find a used copy of the movieThe Christmas Story. Dan loved it, and the idea of eating Chinese food on Christmas suddenly seemed very special. Every Christmas they’d spent together, they ordered Chinese food.

River had seenWhite Christmasbut it was on her own. After she moved out. Somehow, Rose had changed her memories in an attempt to make herself feel better. River stuffed down a sudden flare of irritation. Rose couldn’t help it. There was never going to be justice for the way Rose had treated her children. There could only be forgiveness. There was no other path to travel. It was the only road in front of her.

“Sure, Mom. I hope you enjoy it tonight. I ... I miss you.”

“Oh, honey. I miss you too. Maybe I can make my famous beef stew for you when you get home.”

“That would be great, Mom. I’d better go. I’ll see you soon.”

“Okay, honey. I love you.”

“I ... I love you too, Mom.”

River disconnected the call and stared at her phone. This was hard. How long would Rose be like this? She was slowly becoming the mother she’d always wanted. One that hadn’t existed before she became ill. It was true that she’d been a decent mother when her father was with them, but it was as if she were playing a part. There was distance—a kind of disconnect toward her children. Rose had adored her husband. Lived for him. Dan and River were simply the window dressing. A happy family living under the direction of a harsh and vengeful God. Trying to look like the perfect family. It was a ruse but, at least for a while, it worked in a weird way.

“Are you okay?”

River jumped at the sound of Tony’s voice. She’d almost forgotten he was there. He’d gotten up and was standing next to the corkboard.

“I don’t know. I’m just trying to deal with my mother’s illness—adjust to this new reality. It’s hard. But what you said earlier helped me. Thank you.”

“I’ll always be here when you need me, River. You know that, right?”

She looked up at him and saw something in his eyes that made her catch her breath. “I do,” she said softly. “You’re the best friend I’ve ever had.”

When the words left her mouth, she immediately regretted them. His face tightened, and he looked away from her. She wanted to tell him something different. Express the truth that dwelt deep in her heart. But she wasn’t whole yet. She was too vulnerable. Too afraid of commitment. Still, she wanted to find a way to heal the wound she’d just caused. She took a deep, shaky breath.

“Can ... can that be enough ... for now? I’m not...”

He turned around and met her gaze. “It’s okay. I understand. I really do. When ... or if ... you’re ever ready...” He choked up and started to walk away.

“Not if, Tony. Just when.”

His slow smile melted something inside her. This was not a man to be afraid of. This was a man she could trust. That she could ... love someday. As long as he was willing to wait.

Before either one of them could say anything else, Tony’s phone rang. He picked it up and looked at it.

“It’s Arnie.”

It had to be about the possibility of listening devices being hidden in their office. River didn’t want to believe it was true. But how else could the Strangler’s partner know where they were? Tony was certain they weren’t followed, and she trusted him when it came to spotting a tail.

Tony sat down and listened to Arnie. It was definitely a one-way conversation. River realized she was holding her breath andlet it out in a rush. She opened her laptop and stared at their profile, but it was as if the words in front of her made no sense. She couldn’t do anything but focus on Tony’s phone call. When he finally hung up, she still knew nothing. River could feel her heart beating in her chest. If she was certain there wasn’t a bug in the office, why was her body reacting like this?

“Arnie had the building manager let his people into our office.”

River braced herself for what she knew was coming. What she was afraid to hear.

“They found a bug under your desk, River. It had to be put there by the Strangler’s apprentice.”

CHAPTER

TWENTY-SIX

He’s been in our office, River,” Tony said, trying to choke back the rage he felt. He didn’t want to frighten her, but they had to do something. They couldn’t allow this killer—this evil man—to get close to them again. “Maybe we should move.”

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