Page 82 of Finding Home

“Who was she visiting?”

“Do you remember Jamie?”

“Yeah. He was a dick,” Tobey grumbled.

“You thought so?” Elle raised an eyebrow.

“The things he’d say to you and the way he looked at you.I didn’t like him.I didn’t trust him.”Tobey stopped speaking,looking between Jamie’s gravestone and Elle, an angry red flashing into his face.“Was it him?”

She swallowed hard. “During winter break my freshman year, Jamie raped me.”

Tobey’s hand hovered over hers, as if trying to figure out if he should touch her or not. Elle held her breath until his warm palm rested on her. She closed her eyes in relief.

“I’ve only told two other people this. Well, now three.” Mom still didn’t believe her, so she shouldn’t count.

“Your mom and…”

“Clayton.”

“Clayton?”

“I told him the night of your wedding, after running into Mom. I had a bit of a break down, and he was there.”

“He’s a good man.”

“The best.” Her lips tugged up.

“Your mom?”

“I told her a few weeks after it happened, but she just kept saying that he wouldn’t do that and repeating that he loved her.”

“What the fuck?” Storm clouds darkened his blue eyes.

“She always chose them, her men, over me.”

“If my dad knew, he’d be furious with her.”

“Please don’t tell him. He can’t know,” she begged.

“Elle, this is your story; you choose who to share it with.”

“No. It’s not my story!” Elle screamed, gesturing to her heart. “It’s part, but it’s not all.I’m so much more than this.I’m so much more than all of it.”

This had defined her for so long. All of it. The abandonment, the emotional neglect, the mocking cruel jabs, the prodding to be better somehow, and the rape had wrapped their gnarled fingers around her, holding her in place as their sharp teeth attempted to devour all that was good about Eleanor. But as Elle, she’ddiscovered she was a phoenix rising from the ashes of who she’d been.

“You’re right.” He squeezed her hand. “You always are.”

“Well, I am one of your favorite people.”Her statement sounded more like a question as she peered back at his softening features.

“I think you’re my favorite, actually.”He leaned in and looped his arm around her shoulder, pressing her into his side. “Just don’t tell Jerome.”

“Your secret is safe with me.”

“I’m not going to say anything to dad, and I won’t push you, but if you told him, he’d understand.He loves you.”

“I know and I love him, that’s why I can’t…why I won’t tell him.”

“I don’t understand.”

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