Page 74 of Finding Home

“Stop.” Exasperation punctuated his sigh. Placing his hands on her shoulders, he said, “Yes, I get to see Nat, but that’s not why I am here. You are never an excuse; you are the reason.”

“I’m sorry.”She swallowed a newly formed lump in her throat.

“Tell me what’s going on in that beautiful brain of yours?”

“I…”She sucked in a steadying breath.“…I am so confident when it comes to work. I am a fucking rockstar and I refuse to humble myself to fit anyone’s image of a woman. I can slay everyone else’s dragons without fear of getting burnt, but when it’s me…just me…just Elle, I feel not enough…not worth it.”

“Oh, baby…” He pressed his sad smile against her forehead. “There is no such thing as just Elle. I wish you could see yourself through my eyes.”

There was no reason to doubt Clayton.His behavior was evidence of his desire to be there, to be with her. This was all about her inadequacies.Was she so broken that she couldn’t allow his affection to penetrate the bricks of fear and self-doubt that layered the still intact, but crumbling, wall around her heart?

“I like when you call me baby.” A small smile budded.

“Me too.” He ran soothing strokes down her back.

Elle could feel the gentle thumping of his heart as she pressed against his chest, letting the citrus scent invade her nostrils. Its freshness and the heat of his body were a soothing balm.She needed to remember this. He was there for her. She was precious to him. She needed to hold that like an amulet, warding off the ghosts that howled that she was unworthy.

TWENTY-EIGHT

“To be fond of dancing was a certain step to falling in love.”

~Jane Austen,Pride and Prejudice

After a long afternoon of meetings and site visits, Elle reentered the lobby and found herself riding up in the elevator with Malcolm.

“You did great today,”Malcolm said, as the elevator dinged for her floor.“When we were at the clinic earlier today, their director pulled me aside to say how excited they are about this Tele-Cardiology pilot you spoke with her about.I didn’t know you would be pitching anything.”

“Well, I was prepared if the opportunity arose,”Elle replied as she stepped off the elevator. She turned to Malcolm, who wore an unsurprised smile on his face.

“I’ve noticed that the opportunity always seems to arise when you are in the picture.”He nodded.“See you tonight.”

As the mirrored doors closed, Elle did a victory dance.She needed to carry this confidence with her for the rest of the day.No doubt the hotel’s camera caught every sashay of her happy hips, but who cared.

The TV hummed in the room as Elle entered.Slipping her shoes off at the door, the faint sound of the shower greeted her. Scanning the room, she noticed a yellow Post-It beside a bottle of water and bag of nuts. Warmth spread through her at his careful handwriting saying,Elle’s snack.

With a mischievous grin, Elle disrobed, leaving her clothes in a heap on the carpet. Creeping into the bathroom, tendrils of steam danced around her.

God bless glass showers!Clayton’s backside was framed in the door of the shower, his face raised under the spraying water.Licking her lips, she watched the soapy foam glide down his muscular back, dripping to his ass. The muscles flexed as he lathered shampoo through his sandy hair. Elle’s breath shallowed, thinking of those massaging fingers exploring her body.As he washed away the shampoo, Elle slid the door open.

“Elle.”A smile filled his voice, as he continued to stand with his back to her. “You’re early.”

“Indeed,” she sassed, running her finger up his spine, feeling his pleasure shiver against her.“Turn around.”

“Elle.”He repeated her name with a lopsided grin, as he turned facing her. The water licked every taut inch of his torso.

“Let me take care of you,”she murmured, running her fingers along the small trail of hair from his belly button leading down.

Eyes locked with his, she lowered to her knees.Her hands caressed up his strong legs, cupping his ass, eliciting a breathy laugh from him. Her lips pressed against Clayton’s inner thighs as she moved up to his swelling length. His needy moans, ragged breath, rocking hips, and gentle tugs on her hair signaled his enjoyable undoing.

Later, Elle stood in front of the bathroom mirror, swiping a soft pink lip stain over her lips, the final touch to her outfit. Her hair hung in loose wavy tendrils past her bare shoulders.Pink pearls, a gift from Tobey from his Hawaiian honeymoon, rested at her collarbone, a slightly lighter shade than the rosy satin dress she wore. Elle’s hands glided down the smooth fabric, admiring how it hugged each curve creating a sexy and sophisticated silhouette.

Aunt Janet was spot on about this dress!Maybe she’d have to go shopping with her aunt more often.

Pushing into her strappy silver kitten heels, she turned a few times in the bathroom mirror before taking a selfie to send to Viet and Willa.

Reveling in the surging confidence, she stashed her phone in her silver clutch, and joined Clayton in the other room.

“I’m ready.”

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