“Nobody else will tell you this, so I’ll say it,” he said shortly. “Isabella broke your trust, so you wrapped yourself up and tried to turn your heart to ice. You can’t live like that. You can’t. I know how much it can hurt, how easy it is to distance yourself to avoid further heartbreak, but it will only calcify your heart, mummify you alive. Is that what you want, Theo?”
Theo swallowed hard, his wit deserting him. He opened his mouth, but suddenly there was no sharp retort dancing on the tip of his tongue.
“I… I can’t,” he managed, at last. It was a dragged-out comment and had no relation to the question Stephen had just asked. “I can’t, Stephen.”
Stephen sighed, placing a hand on his friend’s shoulder. “Don’t you think Anna deserves the truth? About all of it.Allof it.”
There was a long pause between them. A footman passed by, bearing a tray of dirty glasses that really should have been taken away the previous night, and shot them both a curious stare.
Theo’s heart was pounding hard in his chest, his pulse drumming in his ears. He felt ill and giddy, and he tried to tell himself it was because he hadn’t eaten breakfast that morning.
“I… I don’t want to lose her,” he said, and decided not to investigate whether he meant Kitty or Anna.
Stephen nodded slowly as if he understood. “You must do something, Theo. You must.”
“I’ve been thinking, and I’m going to talk to him. You know.Him.”
“I know the man you are speaking of.”
Theo drew in a breath. “I’m going to ask him to leave London once and for all, and promise to stay away from Kitty. I won’t see her ruined. And once that business is concluded, I am going to tell Anna the full story about… about Isabella, and Kitty, and, of course, me. I’ll omit no details. I shall look her in the eye while I speak. I will… be honest with her.”
Somehow, when he said that, the tension left Theo’s shoulders, like shrugging off a heavy weight. He even breathed deeply, feeling as though something that had been wrapped tight around his chest suddenly loosened.
Stephen looked at him for a long moment and then nodded slowly. “That’s good, Theo. You’re a brave man, you know.”
“And a fool.”
“Yes, yes, that too. Theo the Fool.”
CHAPTER 25
Anna wiped the back of her hand across her nose, a deeply unladylike motion that would have gotten her expelled from Society in the blink of an eye. She had handkerchiefs somewhere.
Or had she packed them?
The tears had dried on her face, and she was determined not to shed any more. Not over that awful, wretched man. She was packing her things with reckless abandon, bunching up gowns that would take hours to press back into shape, stuffing shawls and slippers and underthings in bags, and then leaning heavily on the mass of clothing to close the bag.
What should I take? None of the gowns he bought me, that’s for sure.
But when Anna looked over her clothes, they were unbearably shabby and old-fashioned. A duchess couldn’t wear those things, and they were more constricting than she could have imagined.
Where do I even intend to go?
Home, of course, to Mama and Daphne and Emily.
Oh, home. Are you sure that place is home? You left, didn’t you? You married and left, became a duchess.
A homeless duchess. What a thing.
“Would you like help with the packing, Your Grace?”
Anna jumped almost a mile into the air, spinning around. “Good heavens, Mrs. Haunt, you nearly scared the life out of me!”
The housekeeper had appeared almost noiselessly in the room, just beyond the open doorway. Her eyes were fixed on the suitcases and bags sprawled open on the bed.
“I apologize, Your Grace,” she answered. “But I was told that you had summoned the carriage to pick you up within the hour. You seem to be packing a great deal. Your Grace, are you… are you leaving?”
Anna’s eyes squeezed shut. “Mrs. Haunt…”