Page 132 of In It to Win It

I look up at JP. He’s standing near me and he’s holding a huge bouquet of flowers—sunflowers. But not just any sunflowers: there are golden yellow ones, but also orange and red and brown, and some with all those colors, all with deep chocolate centers. They glow in the dim room.

I lift my gaze to his face.

He’s not smiling, but his eyes are intent on me.

“These are for you,” he says, holding out the flowers to me. “Happy New Year. I hope the year brings you joy and happiness and light.”

I slowly reach for the flowers.

“Do you know what sunflowers symbolize?” he asks quietly, moving closer to hand the bouquet to me.

“Um. No.” My heart is hammering against my breastbone. My mouth has gone dry. My hands shake as they take the flowers.

“They symbolize adoration, loyalty, and longevity.”

He’s close to me now, close enough for me to see his long eyelashes, the darker ring of blue around his sapphire irises, the carved shape of his beautiful mouth.

“Which I think is perfect for you,” he says. “Because . . . I adore you.”

I can’t breathe. I glance wildly around and yep, everyone’s watching this unfold.

“You’re loyal,” he says. “To your family and your friends . . . and even to me when I screw up.” He swallows. “As for longevity . . . I would like a chance to have that with you.”

My insides are shivering. My tongue feels swollen in my mouth and I can’t speak. My eyes probably look like they’re going to pop out of my head. I clutch the flowers tightly.

“I screwed up again,” he says. “Breaking up with you was the biggest, stupidest mistake I’ve ever made, because I love you. But this time, I’m trying to learn from my mistake. I’m asking you to forgive me. I’ll understand if you can’t. But I’m going to try to forgive myself so I can move forward.”

I’m blinking fast now, my eyes smarting.

It feels like everyone in the house is holding their breath, even though music is still pumping out of the speakers.

This is really . . . weird. And uncomfortable. But I’m just drunk enough that I don’t care.

“JP . . .” My bottom lip quavers. I step closer to him. I glance around. “I love you, too.”

He grins.

A cheer goes up around us.

“Oh my God.” I duck my head briefly. “What is happening?”

“I wanted to do this in front of everyone so if I crashed and burned, I’d be properly humiliated.”

“You’re crazy.”

“Yeah.”

Our eyes meet. We both smile. And I’m lost in it, twirling in a sparkling blue tornado, sucked up in JP’s beautiful eyes and warm smile and . . . love. There’s nobody else but JP in that moment.

“Can you forgive me?” he murmurs. “I was such an idiot.”

“Yes, you were.”

“I’m sorry. You inspire me,” he says in a low voice that only I can hear now. “I nearly killed your dog and you forgave me. I lost it on the ice and cost the team games . . . and you still supported me.”

I swallow, my throat feeling like a puck is lodged there, still focused on his face. “Yes. Because that’s what love is. But you have to love yourself, JP.”

He nods. “I know.”

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